Joke Thread 5

[Cordy]

Keir Starmer is out jogging and accidently falls into a river. Three young lads saw the accident and without a second thought jump in and drag out the scared and soaking Starmer.
"Lads, you've saved my life and you all deserve a reward. You name it and I'll give it to you", said Starmer.
First lad says, "I'd like a holiday to Disneyland". Starmer says, "certainly."
Second lad says, "I'd like the latest Xbox and a new TV." Starmer says, "no problem."
Third lad says, "I'd like a wheelchair with built in Wi-Fi and stereo attached to it."
Starmer says, "HEY....but you're not handicapped." The lad replies, "not yet but I will be when my dad finds out I saved you from drowning."

 

[John Brown]

Keir Starmer is out jogging and accidently falls into a river. Three young lads saw the accident and without a second thought jump in and drag out the scared and soaking Starmer.
"Lads, you've saved my life and you all deserve a reward. You name it and I'll give it to you", said Starmer.
First lad says, "I'd like a holiday to Disneyland". Starmer says, "certainly."
Second lad says, "I'd like the latest Xbox and a new TV." Starmer says, "no problem."
Third lad says, "I'd like a wheelchair with built in Wi-Fi and stereo attached to it."
Starmer says, "HEY....but you're not handicapped." The lad replies, "not yet but I will be when my dad finds out I saved you from drowning."

It's very funny, because the young lads do the decent thing, and help a person less fortunate, but one of their dads, being right wing, is likely to perform violent acts against his own offspring!
Brilliant!

 

[Robbo3]

 

[The_Yellow_Ardvark]

 

[Doug B]

 

[Cozzer]

You could always try it, and report back with your findings

I can't help the original poster either, I'm afraid.

I've never found a bottle of Domestos with a wide enough neck...

 

[JAW911]

It's very funny, because the young lads do the decent thing, and help a person less fortunate, but one of their dads, being right wing, is likely to perform violent acts against his own offspring!
Brilliant!

Yes - it clearly needed explaining. Thanks

 

[John Brown]

Yes - it clearly needed explaining. Thanks

Needs deleting, IMO.
A) Political.
B) Not funny.

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 186561

Come on then, what's their answer?

 

[Phill05]

It's very funny, because the young lads do the decent thing,
Brilliant!

Needs deleting, IMO.
A) Political.
B) Not funny.

It's a joke, long live the Joke Thread

 

[stuart little]

Needs deleting, IMO.
A) Political.
B) Not funny.

It's hilarious!

 

[John Brown]

It's hilarious!

No comment.

 

[Phil Pascoe]

Anything that offends left wing sensibilities is funny to me. We lived through years of the Tories being fair game (and quite rightly) and that was considered fine.

If we removed every post because someone didn't consider it funny there wouldn't be anything left.

 

[John Brown]

Anything that offends left wing sensibilities is funny to me. We lived through years of the Tories being fair game (and quite rightly) and that was considered fine.

If we removed every post because someone didn't consider it funny there wouldn't be anything left.

I am aware of your stance, Phil, but thanks for reiterating it.
The last joke thread was locked because it was too political.

 

[Phil Pascoe]

Funny how it was never political when the subject was on the other side.

 

[Cobbs]

How about we leave the politics out of this joke thread and someone start a political joke thread where we can all say whatever it is we want to say on the satire front and leave this thread to the non-political humour? Just a thought, but it might keep everyone happy...(unlikely I know.)

 

[paulrbarnard]

Anything that offends left wing sensibilities is funny to me. We lived through years of the Tories being fair game (and quite rightly) and that was considered fine.

If we removed every post because someone didn't consider it funny there wouldn't be anything left.

Oh come on. “What’s brown and sticky?” Has universal appeal.

 

[John Brown]

Funny how it was never political when the subject was on the other side.

Your idea of funny, not mine.

 

[John Brown]

Oh come on. “What’s brown and sticky?” Has universal appeal.

Parcel tape?

 

[Blackswanwood]