Joke Thread II
- Thread starter JBaz
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SamG340
Established Member
May ,Hammond and Clarkson are guesting on the joke thread 2 next week that will be fun 
Wow what a result. Three jokes for the price of one.May ,Hammond and Clarkson are guesting on the joke thread 2 next week that will be fun
SamG340
Established Member
I think the whole Richard hammond part was a bit of a car crash ...
OCtoolguy
Established Member
I never knew they had those on a Beemer. I've NEVER seen them in use til now.
OCtoolguy
Established Member
To be fair, most drivers in the US don't know what clutch pedals and gear sticks are for either...
You're correct - in most of Europe it's regarded as typical of people driving Mercedes, Porsche and Audi as well. It's unfair to pick on BMW drivers...
You're correct - in most of Europe it's regarded as typical of people driving Mercedes, Porsche and Audi as well. It's very unfair to pick on BMW drivers...
But, I have to speak as I find and I find less indicating going on with BMW drivers than with others on the road. When they do surprise me by indicating, it tends to be when they get the sequence wrong and end up indicating as they are already at the junction, or roundabout, so they, in fact, indicate their manoeuvre rather than the intention. Manoeuvre, indicate, mirror; the mirror being optional.
Jester129
Established Member
Speed limits don't apply to Mercedes drivers......
This car argument has ceased to be funny, but here's another one, BMW drivers seem to be pretty serious about their driving and easily offended. Can we even have a joke thread without upsetting people's feelings if there is a whiff of prejudice? Sorry, I should have added "some" BMW drivers... That's the problem I think, but what comedian ever started a sentence with the word "Some"?
Doug B
Shy Tot
Yorkieguy
Established Member
Yorkieguy
Established Member
My wife and I both drive BMWs ……often wondered what the intermittent green flashing lights were for.
stuart little
Established Member
Looks like we're losing the thread again ffolks!You're correct - in most of Europe it's regarded as typical of people driving Mercedes, Porsche and Audi as well. It's unfair to pick on BMW drivers...
You're correct - in most of Europe it's regarded as typical of people driving Mercedes, Porsche and Audi as well. It's very unfair to pick on BMW drivers...
stuart little
Established Member
I'll nip up the road & have words with Hamster!May ,Hammond and Clarkson are guesting on the joke thread 2 next week that will be fun
Alex H
Established Member
The Old Man And The Beaver
An 85-year-old man went to his doctor for his annual check up.
The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 85-year-old replied "Things are great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child - so what do you think about that Doc ?"
The doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story.
"I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season. One day he was setting off to go hunting and, in a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun.
"As he neared a lake , he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge. He realized he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature.
"Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favorite hunting rifle, and went 'bang, bang'. Miraculously, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.
"Now, what do you think of that ?" asked the doctor.
The 85-year-old said "Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."
The doctor replied , "My point exactly."
An 85-year-old man went to his doctor for his annual check up.
The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 85-year-old replied "Things are great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child - so what do you think about that Doc ?"
The doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story.
"I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season. One day he was setting off to go hunting and, in a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun.
"As he neared a lake , he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge. He realized he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature.
"Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favorite hunting rifle, and went 'bang, bang'. Miraculously, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.
"Now, what do you think of that ?" asked the doctor.
The 85-year-old said "Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."
The doctor replied , "My point exactly."
SamG340
Established Member
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