Joke Thread 5
- Thread starter Noel
- Start date
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I read in Trout and Salmon years ago that pheromones produced by pubic hair from women was an excellent attractor for salmon.
Not realising the pubic hairs had to be cut and tied to the fly first, I broke three rods trying to cast the wife into the river.
Do they leave the bolts thoughWell you made me laugh my pet hate is squirrels they pinch all my nuts!!!!
TinTIn, by all accounts*, and french / belge folklore, batted for the other side.. or at least was AC/DC.
Yes I know, fictional character, but french BD forums , posts by those who knew the author etc etc .
Explains the singer in Bronski Beats's..hairstyle..not passing judgement at all , merely an observation.
Yes I know, fictional character, but french BD forums , posts by those who knew the author etc etc .
Explains the singer in Bronski Beats's..hairstyle..not passing judgement at all , merely an observation.
Last edited:
The_Yellow_Ardvark
Established Member
Bigly!
Doug B
Shy Tot
Etaf
Established Member
Australia says...Hold my beer.
Jaco
Established Member
Wonderfully British!
In a train from London to Manchester, an American was berating the Englishman sitting across from him.
"The trouble with you English is that you are so bloody stuffy ...
You set yourselves above the average person.
Do you really think your stiff upper lip attitude really works…
Look at me: I'm me! I have a little Italian in me, a bit of Greek blood, a little Irish and some Spanish blood.
What do you say to that?"
The Englishman lowered his newspaper and replied, "How very sporting of your mother."
In a train from London to Manchester, an American was berating the Englishman sitting across from him.
"The trouble with you English is that you are so bloody stuffy ...
You set yourselves above the average person.
Do you really think your stiff upper lip attitude really works…
Look at me: I'm me! I have a little Italian in me, a bit of Greek blood, a little Irish and some Spanish blood.
What do you say to that?"
The Englishman lowered his newspaper and replied, "How very sporting of your mother."
Jaco
Established Member
BBQ Rules
It is BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory
on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's
the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there
is an element of danger involved.
When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are
put into motion:
Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray
along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to
the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
Here comes the important part:
(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine....
(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He
thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals
with the situation.
Important again:
(7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine....
(8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins,
sauces, and brings them to the table.
(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
(10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And,
upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no
pleasing some women....
It is BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory
on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's
the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there
is an element of danger involved.
When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are
put into motion:
Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray
along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to
the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
Here comes the important part:
(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine....
(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He
thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals
with the situation.
Important again:
(7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine....
(8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins,
sauces, and brings them to the table.
(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
(10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And,
upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no
pleasing some women....
The barbecue was invented by a woman, it’s the only way to get us blokes doing the cooking.
Cozzer
Established Member
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