Joke Thread 5

[artie]

Is that your final answer?

yes.
1278 Guineas would be £1341 and 18s


Edit to add

£1278 an 18s would be 1218 guineas.

 

[John Brown]

yes.
1278 Guineas would be £1341 and 18s


Edit to add

£1278 an 18s would be 1218 guineas.

Yes. That's what I said.

 

[John Brown]

yes.
1278 Guineas would be £1341 and 18s


Edit to add

£1278 an 18s would be 1218 guineas.

I think I see the problem, I thought your arithmetic was faulty, but it's your reading.
To be fair, a 7 and a 1 could be confused on a small screen.

 

[artie]

I think I see the problem, I thought your arithmetic was faulty, but it's your reading.
To be fair, a 7 and a 1 could be confused on a small screen.

Just so long as I'm wrong eh.

 

[John Brown]

Just so long as I'm wrong eh.

?? You were wrong, I'm graciously accepting that it's easy to mistake a 1 for a 7. What's your beef?

 

[artie]

?? You were wrong, I'm graciously accepting that it's easy to mistake a 1 for a 7. What's your beef?

no beef

 

[johnb80]

HAVE YOU GOT SEX INSURANCE?​

You can now get sex insurance in the UK from many different company’s. To help you get the correct insurance for sex youre having please consult the list below.

Sex with your wife – Legal and General

Sex on the telephone – Direct Line

Sex with your partner – Standard Life

Sex with someone different – Go Compare

Sex with a lady of generous proportions – More Than

Sex on the back seat of a car – Sheila’s Wheels

Sex with a prostitute – Commercial Union

Sex with your maid – Employers Liability

Sex with an OAP – Saga

Sex resulting in pregnancy – General Accident

Sex with animals – National Farmers Union

Sex with a Monk – Abbey Life

Sex with Navy Officers – Admiral Group

Sex with a transvestite – Confused.com

 

[Doug B]

 

[Cozzer]

Purchase tax?

Talking of "the old days", does anyone remember the time when you had to stick a postage stamp on your cheque?
Come to think, when did you last write a cheque?!