Joke Thread 5

[Yorkieguy]

 

[Yorkieguy]

 

[Yorkieguy]

 

[Yorkieguy]

 

[Yorkieguy]

 

[Yorkieguy]

 

[Yorkieguy]

 

[selectortone]

 

[collingg]

Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!

 

[DrPhill]

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She does not say it is all a hoax: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judith_Curry
"she accepts that the planet is warming, that human-generated greenhouse gases like carbon dioxide cause warming, and that the plausible worst-case scenario is potentially catastrophic, but on the other hand she also proposes that the rate of warming is slower than climate models have projected, emphasizes her evaluation of the uncertainty in the climate projection models, and questions whether climate change mitigation is affordable."

 

[Cabinetman]

She does not say it is all a hoax: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judith_Curry
"she accepts that the planet is warming, that human-generated greenhouse gases like carbon dioxide cause warming, and that the plausible worst-case scenario is potentially catastrophic, but on the other hand she also proposes that the rate of warming is slower than climate models have projected, emphasizes her evaluation of the uncertainty in the climate projection models, and questions whether climate change mitigation is affordable."

From the little I’ve read that sounds fair— Damn, sorry crashed the jokes, blast !!!!!

 

[treeturner123]

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And the other 40+ holes are where?

Sorry, forgot, a joke thread not conspiracy!

Phil

 

[selectortone]

View attachment 190944

Why is this funny? This is supposed to be a joke thread. It seems to be morphing into a 'repeat some cra*p I saw on facebook' thread.

 

[Chubber]

One day the circus comes to town, and the star turn is Supremo the Lion Tamer. After the lions perform many amazing feats, he asks for absolute silence throughout the Big Top as he tells everyone that he is about to perform the most dangerous trick in the lion tamers' repertoire.

He sends all the lions bar one back down the tunnel to their cages and stands in front of the biggest, fiercest lion.

'Now, complete silence!' he commands...

He takes the lion by the nose and chin, opens its huge jaws until they are a gaping 12" apart, then swiftly and calmly drops his trousers and rests his member on the animal's lower lip.

'One, two, three, four, five' intones Supremo and as the lion's jaws swing shut with a resounding snap he whisks himself away, pulls up his trousers, sends the lion to its cage and bows to the astounded applauding audience .

Supremo announces 'Now, I will give £1,000 to any other man in the audience who is prepared to do the same! Anyone? Anyone?

Amazingly, a voice calls out 'Me, yes me, I'd like to do it....' and an effeminate slightly built chap minces his way down to the ring.

'Are you sure?' ask Leo, 'Oh yes' says the man, 'but there is just one thing.....I don't think I can open my mouth that wide...'

 

[Noel]

Why is this funny? This is supposed to be a joke thread. It seems to be morphing into a 'repeat some cra*p I saw on facebook' thread.

Would have to agree. Quantity v quality.
Anybody want to be a joke board moderator (as opposed to a joke moderator........) : )

@Yorkieguy Some of your posts are funny, some very funny but many are mere statements rather than jokes.
Thanks.

 

[dzj]

 

[RobinBHM]

View attachment 190947

I wasnt aware any had come true

 

[RobinBHM]

you know when they talk about supply and demand in economics...............

 

[Doug B]

Can’t help but say it out loud

 

[Sachakins]

Sad news today. After 5 years of medical training, one of my mates has been struck off due to a minor discretion. He slept with one of his patients and can no longer do the job he loves. What a waste of time and money. Genuinely a great guy and a brilliant vet!