Joke Thread 5

[Doug B]

 

[stuart little]

The ! Indicates factorial which in this case is root (9) ie. 3. Factorial 3 is 3 x 2 x 1 = 6, minus 1 hence 5.

Oh! Did I ONCE learn learn that?

 

[stuart little]

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 187817

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 187815

 

[stuart little]

Two today, I must be feeling better!

 

[Phil Pascoe]

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 187701

Who's this pratt? What's he doing being ON MY screen???????????
Take a hike to Siberia!

 

[Phill05]

View attachment 187827

Don't think it's your coats he's after it your MONEY

 

[Doug B]

 

[Phil Pascoe]

That probably explains why I never found Tommy Cooper funny.

 

[paulrbarnard]

Oh! Did I ONCE learn learn that?

Some of us actually use it.

 

[Fergie 307]

Some of us actually use it.

And hat's off to you sir, used to drive me mad at school could never really get my head around it

 

[kinverkid]

 

[paulrbarnard]

View attachment 187850

My favourite line from ALF was him existing the toilet and saying “you might want to give that a couple of your earth minutes”. I still use that today.

Funnily enough there is a bit of a resemblance to The Donald

 

[Yorkieguy]

View attachment 187797

Go on then:

What passes for Australian Foreplay? 'WAKE UP'!!!

From Cathy Lette - Australian Comedienne on Australian intellect: 'Australians think 'erudite' is a tube of glue'.

It's a challenge to insult two countries simultaneously, but when asked for his thoughts on the migration of New Zealanders to Australia, the then Prime Minister of New Zealand Robert Muldoon managed it when he stated: the "annual exodus of Kiwis to Australia raised the average IQ of both countries".

 

[paulrbarnard]

It's a challenge to insult two countries simultaneously, but when asked for his thoughts on the migration of New Zealanders to Australia, the then Prime Minister of New Zealand Robert Muldoon managed it when he stated: the "annual exodus of Kiwis to Australia raised the average IQ of both countries".

Nope that’s just an insult to Australians. The point being those leaving New Zealand are more intelligent than Australians so their arrival in Australia raises the average IQ in Australia. However the people leaving New Zealand must be stupid so have a lower IQ than those staying. Their leaving raises the average IQ in New Zealand.

 

[niall Y]

The other interpretation is that it is those with a low IQ leaving New Zealand. added to the even lower IQ of Australia, has managed to raise Australia's IQ.

 

[Thingybob]

My favourite line from ALF was him existing the toilet and saying “you might want to give that a couple of your earth minutes”. I still use that today.

Funnily enough there is a bit of a resemblance to The Donald

No theres no bullet hole in his right ear

 

[Robbo3]