Joke Thread 4 (closed).

[Phil Pascoe]

Yeah, just like they should have built the streets of Fowey and Looe wide enough for trucks and buses.

 

[Doug B]

 

[RobinBHM]

I don’t know if this is allowed in the joke thread, but it is very funny (I know the video is age restricted, but it’s not rude or showing anything unpleasant)


This guy has become known as “2 bricks Bob”

 

[Cobbs]

I don’t know if this is allowed in the joke thread, but it is very funny


This guy has become known as “2 bricks Bob”

Think that qualifies as instant karma!

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 185708

Doesn't quite work.

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 185508

Get orf my screen!

 

[Yorkieguy]

Doesn't quite work.

It doesn't if you pronounce his surname 'Gogh' as 'Goff' but it does if you pronounce it 'Go'.

So yes, for example,'Verti-Goff makes no sense but 'Verti-Go' does.

Vincent Van Gogh war born in the Netherlands and his name in Dutch was pronounced with a guttural “gh/ch” ending. But, he spent many years working and living in France and thus, his name was pronounced there as Van Go/Gou. English speakers, for the most part, have picked up the French pronunciation.

I see this thread as just light-hearted (sometimes facile, or even infantile) trivia - escapism in a troubled world.

As an aside, I try to self-moderate before posting in this or any other thread, and in debates, if I disagree with someone's point of view, I try to do so without being disagreeable ('going for the ball - not the player'). Where humour is concerned, it's become desperately easy to take offence when none was intended, or to cause offence when none is merited. I recently posted a cartoon, which - on reflection - crossed the line. I was pleased and relieved to note that a moderator had deleted it, and I've concluded that it's time that I started acting my age - not my shoe size, so I think I've run my distance in this thread.

“The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word of it.”

Omar Khayyam (18 May 1048 – 4 December 1131 CE)

He was clever.

 

[Yorkieguy]

Get orf my screen!

I'm off!

 

[Phil Pascoe]

 

[Just4Fun]

I've concluded that it's time that I started acting my age - not my shoe size

I would be quite happy to act my shoe size, but then my shoe size on the local scale here is 45 and that was a while ago.

 

[The_Yellow_Ardvark]

 

[Vulcan]

 

[johnb80]

Hubby goes off fishing, he gets set up, cast the line in and within 1 minute he’d caught a 10lb fish. He cast the line again, within another minute he’d caught an 11lb fish. He kept on repeating the process and caught a fish every minute all between 10 and 11lb, it was an amazing day.
His phone rang:

Hubby: ‘Hello’

Caller: ‘Mr Johnson?’

Hubby ‘Yes’

Caller: ‘ Hello sir, it’s Dr Parker in casualty at City Hospital, your wife has been involved in a terrible accident, she’s in a critical
condition, you really need to be here’

Hubby ‘Jeez doc, best days fishing Ive had in a long time and now I need to miss it, just caught loads of fish. OK, I’ll pack up and come down.

He wound his line in and he had another 11lb fish, he thought he’d just try one minute, he caught another and another. 30 minutes had gone by he thought he better get down to casualty.

As he walked down the corridor to casualty he met the doctor coming the other way.

Hubby: ‘Hi doc, hows my wife?’
Doc: ‘I know what you did, YOU stayed fishing whilst YOUR wife was here critically ill.’
Doc: ‘Let me tell you this, if your wife needs feeding, YOU will have to feed her’
Doc: ‘If she needs to go to the toilet, YOU will have to take her’
Doc: ‘If she needs a bath, YOU will have to bath her.’
Hubby hung his head in shame and burst into tears.

The doctor laughed and slapped him on the back and said ‘Ha, gotcha, I’m winding you up, I’m only kidding, shes DEAD really, what did you catch?’

 

[Doug B]

 

[Amateur]

 

[Doug B]

 

[TRITON]

“2 bricks Bob”

If thats who i think it is, and given the environment it happened, he's also been named 'Eunuch Powell'

 

[stuart little]

It doesn't if you pronounce his surname 'Gogh' as 'Goff' but it does if you pronounce it 'Go'.

So yes, for example,'Verti-Goff makes no sense but 'Verti-Go' does.

Vincent Van Gogh war born in the Netherlands and his name in Dutch was pronounced with a guttural “gh/ch” ending. But, he spent many years working and living in France and thus, his name was pronounced there as Van Go/Gou. English speakers, for the most part, have picked up the French pronunciation.

I see this thread as just light-hearted (sometimes facile, or even infantile) trivia - escapism in a troubled world.

As an aside, I try to self-moderate before posting in this or any other thread, and in debates, if I disagree with someone's point of view, I try to do so without being disagreeable ('going for the ball - not the player'). Where humour is concerned, it's become desperately easy to take offence when none was intended, or to cause offence when none is merited. I recently posted a cartoon, which - on reflection - crossed the line. I was pleased and relieved to note that a moderator had deleted it, and I've concluded that it's time that I started acting my age - not my shoe size, so I think I've run my distance in this thread.

“The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word of it.”

Omar Khayyam (18 May 1048 – 4 December 1131 CE)

He was clever.

So was I - I thought! Just me making another joke from yourn!

 

[Chubber]

So was I - I thought! Just me making another joke from yourn!

See https://www.google.com/search?q=how...ate=ive&vld=cid:bfde753a,vid:KjOvPZTURLI,st:0

 

[Doug B]