Joke Thread III

[bushwhaker]

And leader/teacher in German is............

Leader is Führer
Teacher is Lehrer.

 

[Stan]

I bet you £5 that if you give me £10, I will give you £20 in return. Any takers?

If so, why?
If not, why not?

(Legal disclaimer: for those with sense of humour blindness, this is not an invitation to enter a binding contract: the clue is that it is in the joke thread).

Nobody took me up on it.

If somebody did hand me a tenner, I would say "I lose", give them a fiver and walk off.

 

[Robbo3]

 

[bushwhaker]

 

[stuart little]

I'm surprised the forum "word list" lets that one through.

Me too!

 

[stuart little]

I had thought of mentioning that, but didn't want to be accused of being a "grammar n@zi" given the subject .I'd have thought it ( the list ) would be set up for "close variants", apparently not. He did get the umlaut though.

That were the idea!

 

[Tom K]

I had a large paperback 20+ years ago of the world's oldest/best racist jokes. The author said that virtually ever joke in it was found in different Countries with different victims, Greek jokes in Melbourne, Polish jokes in Chicago, Italian in Toronto etc.
My sister's a Kiwi - you should hear the jokes there about the Aussies.
My brother in law comes from Plymouth and he said many moons ago that if you wanted to take the pee out of the Cornish it was wise to go to Cornwall to do it - if you did it in Plymouth you were inviting a hiding.

High six to that bro!

 

[Cozzer]

Went in our local bakery this morning...
"Loaf, please..."
"Soft thick white?"

Well, I've been called a few things over the years, but really.....!

 

[Doug B]

 

[Linus]

 

[Robbo3]

 

[Doug B]

 

[llangatwgnedd]

 

[niall Y]

View attachment 161657

Am I the only one who wonders why there isn't a lead on the other battery terminal?

 

[mwinfrance]

Once you accept the concept of talking deer in a living room , on chairs with lacy things on the arms, and a car headlight device being held by one of them..the small things you have to let slide. Probably a cartoonist ( maybe drives a Tesla ) who isn't very "practically minded" like most of them ( brethren ) IME.

 

[niall Y]

Once you accept the concept of talking deer in a living room , on chairs with lacy things on the arms, and a car headlight device being held by one of them..the small things you have to let slide. Probably a cartoonist ( maybe drives a Tesla ) who isn't very "practically minded" like most of them ( brethren ) IME.

I wasn't going to mention the lack of a curtain rail, but why not?.

 

[paulrbarnard]

I wasn't going to mention the lack of a curtain rail, but why not?.

Mr Jefferson is a little lacking too.

 

[mwinfrance]

Mr Jefferson is a little lacking too.

We had all avoided mentioning that / those ..lack of .
Also ..perhaps "Frank" is of the lady persuasion..which might explain the cartoonist's difficulties with AC and DC

 

[dzj]

 

[Thingybob]

Once you accept the concept of talking deer in a living room , on chairs with lacy things on the arms, and a car headlight device being held by one of them..the small things you have to let slide. Probably a cartoonist ( maybe drives a Tesla ) who isn't very "practically minded" like most of them ( brethren ) IME.

So that could be a positive or negative reason