Joke Thread 4 (closed).

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Christopher Columbus was the first economist: crossing the Atlantic, he did not know where he was going; reaching the coast, he did not know where he was, and it was all done with public money.
 
A recent visit to Brighton, on arrival l asked a lady for directions to my hotel, and she said it's only a stone's throw away.

I said will l recognize it?

She said -- it's the one with all the broken windows.
 
I made a trebuchet to try out on the wife, hoping to reach the moon..... I've just past pluto please send NASA!
 
During the seventies, quite a few southern immigrants took up resident in a rural farming district. They pooled their resources, farmed and did well. They were very appreciative of the opportunities that Australia had had given them and collectively decided to bring some southern European culture to their district. The decision was made to commission two sculptures, one a David and one of Venus.

The statues were placed in a local park and stood facing each other for many years. One evening, late, a good fairy was cruising by and noticed the two statues.

The good fairy stopped and asked if they would like to be human for a couple of hours, David, being a wild lad said, "yes please". With that David jumped down off the plinth and raced over to Venus and asked, "What do you reckon Venus how about some fun?", of course the desirable Venus agreed. With that they headed for the nearest shrub.

Soon there was gigling and sighing and they both re-appeared with a flushed satisfied look.
David had a quick at his seiko and saw they had half an hour left. He looked at Venus and said, "How about we do it one more time?". Venus excited by the prospect said, "yes please Davy, but how about we do it differently this time, you hold the pigeons and I will shyte on their heads."
 
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