How I wished swmbo was there!

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Phil Pascoe

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:lol: I was in the tool section of a local department store, and I was listening to a conversation between a young couple. It went thus:-
Look at those spanners - they're only £3.49!
I've already got them.
But they look really good!
No, they're crappe.
Well those little socket sets look ok, and they're only £9.95.
I've already got better ones.
Where are they, then?
At my fathers, because our shed isn't secure.
How much did you pay for them, then?
Oh, I don't know.
Well you must have some idea?
It was several hundred pounds actually, ok, - just keep walking!

I walked around the end of the aisle, straight into another couple :-
What do we need here?
A saw.
But you've got a saw. What's this one for cutting?
Wood.
The saw you've got cuts wood - why do you need two saws that cut wood?...


Having tolerated me for so long, it would have given swmbo a laugh.
 
But chris haven't you already got 30 chisels. Do you really need any more??!!

Adidat
 
Brilliant! Sounds familiar. I have to get all my eBay buys delivered to my mates house to save an argument.
 
Mar_mite":d3c406gd said:
Brilliant! Sounds familiar. I have to get all my eBay buys delivered to my mates house to save an argument.

Yes , it all looks like junk to them and they don't know something is different. :)

Took a while to explain the differences between my old Holbrook metal lathe and the axminster wood turning lathe "Why do you need two lathes? "

best thing is to put something new in the barn and use the saw table. once it is covered in sawdust everything all looks like old junk.
 
I have an arrangement with my beloved. She doesn't complain when I spend my money on tools and I don't complain when she spends her money on shoes. 8)
 
My late wife explained it to me like this...

Every time you buy a chisel, I'm going to buy a milk jug. I was half way through saying "...but you've got loads of m..." Then a light came on!

I started smuggling tools into the shed from then on!
 
I have the best , or the worst luck on this subject. I seem to have a knack for picking up "just the thing , quite by chance, only a day or two before an emergency arises for which a use presents itself. All well and good that Her Wisdom no longer even comments on my purchases (the dreaded what will you use THAT for?). However it would be nice to forego the incipient calamity now that I have reached this weird state of grace. You see, lately I have been looking at sump pumps, the emergency kind that just sit on your recently flooded basement floor to get it down to a shop vac level of clean-up. My shop is in the basement. you put the rest together.
Edit: I said so didn't I? Got the submersible sump pump on sale (great deal at 50 bucks) and this morning I went downstairs at my sons call of "you better see this". Barely got the pump ready and hose to outdoors before the washer sink overflowed with the nastiest stuff imaginable. Septic tank backed up and reversed into the basenent! Pump saved us from truly nasty disaster .
 
with bigger toys that look a bit different one could tell a porky and make something up, but when I was answering my missus, for some reason I didn't.

what's that?
a planer
what's that?
a thicknesser
what's that?
a big planer thicknesser
and what's that in the corner?
a vintage planer thicknesser

there are reasons, honestly. and I;m sure there is a reason I keep looking at planers, thicknessers and planer thicknessers on ebay.

dear god writing it down makes me wonder now.

anyway she has horses so she can go .......

nathan
 
=D> Great story.

As a tradesman I am in the fortunate position of having free licence to buy tools, although SWIMBO does look at me in a questioning manner when several 'antique, therefore better for work' things arrive from Ebay in one week.

My brother however isn't in a trade but is as much a tool addict as any red blooded male (or female). He said a few weeks ago that whilst out shopping with his wife they went to the tool section of the store (to placate him), on the understanding that "he wasn't allowed to buy anything yellow and black". She's got it well worked out!
 
Baldhead":v9nw5beb said:
Mar_mite":v9nw5beb said:
Brilliant! Sounds familiar. I have to get all my eBay buys delivered to my mates house to save an argument.
:lol: :lol: :lol:
That's exactly what I used to do

Baldhead


Although my wife is very understanding, I have just taken delivery of my latest eBay chisel at my work address. There must be a tipping point. :D
 
We have found a reasonable compromise "cos my fair lady once remarked " you can"t play all those guitars at one time" an" I replied "oh and how do you wear all those shoes at one time" ,,,so "guitars an shoes" has become the clincher for both of us when the occasion arises,,(she hasn"t noticed the cymbal that arrived on monday ,,so I am ahead at the moment ),,,
,,,,joe,,,
 
:lol: Motorbikes, this time (overheard at a bike meet) :-
I really fancy another bike, but my missus wouldn't approve.
Don't tell her then!
Well, I can't keep two without her knowing.
Yes you can - just make sure they're the same colour. She'll never know.
She will if she goes in the garage and sees them.
Just keep it in your garden shed or your mates place or somewhere.
Pause for thought.

So you've got two, then?
Smile... no.
You've got more than two?
Yes.
Cheeses, How many have you got?
Nine. :lol: :lol:
 
My mrs says you cant keep buying tools for your shed, what about buying me something nice, so i went down the shop and brought her a mars bar!
 
Reckon one of our neighbours outside Milton Keynes had this sorted. He was interested in vintage tractors and in conversation one day, was asked how many he had. After due thought, he said "about 11, I think". And his Missus used to keep them in good nick driving up and down our road.
 
phil.p":6u99rmhf said:
:lol: Motorbikes, this time (overheard at a bike meet) :-
I really fancy another bike, but my missus wouldn't approve.
Don't tell her then!
Well, I can't keep two without her knowing.
Yes you can - just make sure they're the same colour. She'll never know.
She will if she goes in the garage and sees them.
Just keep it in your garden shed or your mates place or somewhere.
Pause for thought.

So you've got two, then?
Smile... no.
You've got more than two?
Yes.
Cheeses, How many have you got?
Nine. :lol: :lol:

Motorbikes are my first passion. People ask my wife, "What kind of bike has Mick got"? She replies with whatever colour the last one she saw was. So it's easy, as long as I only buy red bikes she is happy.

She hasn't found the white one in the garage under the tarp yet :D

Mick
 
My mate sold his 2 motorbikes to fund his 1.2k chainsaw and mill set up so he could mill some bigger logs we have access to. The only trouble is that when the chainsaw dealer phoned to let him know it was in the shop for pick up it was his wife that answered the phone and the ever helpful asked her is she could let her know that his new saw had arrived. They even told her how much it cost when she asked them. That was funny. That also taught him to use his mobile phone and not treat it as an ornament, it would have saved him a lot of grief from the fallout. I don't have that problem as I have everything delivered to my workshop.
 

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