Christmas dinner advice needed

[artie]

What size turkey should I get for a party of 13 and possibly six police officers?

 

[Stanleymonkey]

There's jail-bird size available for that!

 

[Stanleymonkey]

Friday forecast is chilly - don't forget blankets for the police!!

 

[Rorschach]

A big one, they eat a lot.

 

[billw]

Depends if the police arrive before or after the main course. Surely the question is should you gamble on getting a turkey at all?

 

[clogs]

how big is ur oven ?
get the biggest one that'll go in.....
leftovers for my style is sliced breast and chips n picked red cabbage, on Boxingday, anything else left over goes in a Turkey n Ham pie and a curry......
all the bones and little bits are boiled up for the dogs dinner "Gravey"
nothing is ever left in our house....

 

[billw]

I solved my Xmas dinner issues earlier today when I popped out food shopping and noticed that Greggs are doing a festive bake. 10 mins in the oven and I'm sorted. Would gravy make it too soggy?

 

[Rorschach]

Police better not turn up here, we are having Duck which definitely won't feed extras.

 

[doctor Bob]

what time do you want me and the family to turn up at, Nan and grandad want to come with a few friends as well, said you wouldn't mind?

 

[sploo]

I've checked my recipe book and it says that if you pop the buzzard in Barnard Castle you'll be fine.

 

[Doug B]

If COVID won’t keep them away I’m going for a nut cutlet this year, if that doesn’t put them off I don’t know what will

 

[Terry - Somerset]

Open the window. Redefine the dining room as an outdoor space. Bit cold, but by the time you get to the christmas pud, after "snifters" before, and a bottle of wine during the first two courses, you won't really care!

 

[Chippyofftheoldblock]

What size turkey should I get for a party of 13 and possibly six police officers?

Biggest you can get, When you hear the knock at the door have the turkey in your hand and tell them to stuff it!
You will need very big blankets as most of them are overweight

 

[Blackswanwood]

I’ve heard that if you have relatives around on Christmas Day the police can force entry and make them go home ...... Does anybody know if this is a free service or do you have to book?

 

[Richard_C]

Ask your local butcher for some of the bits of beast they normally grind for sausages.

If your MP turns up you can serve pigs ears while you discuss the £20 billion test and trace programe that has failed miserably, and if plod arrives and says "ello ello ello what's this 'ear then" you have the perfect answer.