Another Joke

[Doug B]

 

[flying haggis]

 

[flying haggis]

 

[Doug B]

 

[flying haggis]

Mrs FH suggested that I should buy her some Essential Oils for her birthday.



Apparently she did not mean 3 in 1 and WD40.

Women, huh?

 

[Stan]

When I was little I asked my dad what he wanted for his birthday. He replied "a crate of guinness and a bunny girl". It was a quite a few years until I understood why my mum hit him.

 

[flying haggis]

 

[Doug B]

 

[Sachakins]

View attachment 107304

God bless her, and ALL who SAIL in her.........

 

[Linus]

View attachment 107399

Where IS that "ouch" emoji?

 

[niemeyjt]

I am fed up with Bill Gates talking about vaccines and I am never going to listen to him or believe a thing he says ever again.

Apparently I've got nerd immunity.

 

[Doug B]

 

[flying haggis]

 

[Stan]

If he was knocked down cold, it must have been a black n decker.

 

[Doug B]

 

[Ozi]

1440.

4800 in a fiver sorry Mr Pedantic here

 

[Ozi]

What's purple and dangerous
A plum with a machine gun

What's yellow and dangerous

Shark infested custard

 

[Doug B]

 

[Ozi]

Someone stole a pair of my wifes knickers off the line last night

Not to worried about the underwear but I would like my 26 pegs back

 

[Sandyn]

I was sitting having breakfast last week. TV was on, but I was busy on the PC, so wasn't really listening, Just picking up the odd word here and there. Didn't have the hearing aids in. There was an article about a female director who was paid a £469 million dividend, but I wasn't paying much attention. then curiosity got the better of me and I asked my wife what kind of business she was involved in. What I heard was..... an on-line decking company. I was doing some drawings on the PC but thinking, "ffs!! how can an online decking company generate so much money that the director gets £469 million??" then the TV conversation turned to discussing how the money was made, based on the misery of others?? I was thinking "Misery?? I really like decking. very therapeutic" Then the conversation turned to people who are addicted. "What??? addicted to decking!!" then the penny dropped...was an on-line betting company. Kept me amused all day!