Nice one Timmo, now we've got some problems to address
If the diamond plate is flexing, put something good and solid under it, 2 or three layers of 18ml mdf works for me.
Any chisel under 6ml will be a problem with the eclipse guide, mainly due to issues clamping it between the sides, I use an extra clamp in my eclipse guide for small chisels, I haven't got my picture upload at the moment, so I'll try a bad description
it's a piece of angle iron, with a piece of flat on top, the whole thing is held together with counter sunk bolts. The chisel is clamped in it, then the whole thing fitted into my eclipse guide.
Then you are right, the whole thing can wobble around on the wheel (great for putting a curve into a plane blade). This movement needs to be controlled by you, hold the guide in two hands, with (if possible) one finger from each hand pushing on the blade (as close to the end as you can). Now take a few strokes (just pulling) and look at the effect on the bevel, It's probably not level, adjust the pressure with your hands to allow the guide to tip a bit (BIG NOTE - only try to adjust the pressure - if you try to consciously adjust the tilt by a physical amount you will over do it). Take more strokes, keep checking!
Try to avoid putting loads of down force on the guide, if you do its bound to tilt and wobble anyway (and cause the diamond plate to flex?) use your fingers on the blade to apply pressure.
Have you flattened the back of the blade? It's a must!! if you want to trim air hairs.
I learnt my sharpening on a tool tuning course with David Charlesworth, there is no alternative to being shown by and getting feedback from someone who knows how to do already.
Hope this helps
keep persevering, you are not alone struggling with this stuff, but one you get a technique and a system that suits worked out, its a great feeling. Especially when you see that bald patch on your arm