If you are cooking a Chilli con carne the secret is to put dark chocolate in it, that mellows the heat a lot.
As for oriental food, coconut milk?
But if you want a real fearsome Chinese cooking sauce here you go, I got it from the You tube channel Souped up kitchen.
Duo Jiao (Fermented Hot chilli sauce)
1 ld of chillis, (I used ring of fire cayenne & habanero cos thats what i had most of growing in the greenhouse!)
1 bulb of garlic
a big chunk of ginger
6 tbsp of salt
1tbsp of sugar
3 tbsp of strong alcohol, vodka, brandy.
Remove stalks & rough chop the chillis, garlic & ginger in a blender put in a bowl & mix in rest of ingredients. Cover & leave for a few days then put in jars. Will keep for about 6 months in the fridge.
A teaspoon of this sauce in a stir fry for three people is proper hot enough for us. Two would be like eating molten Lava. It is bloody gorgeous!