Jacob, and I really shouldnt rise to this, but more people would take you, your experience, and your sometimes very good advice seriously if you weren't such a pillock on occasion. I am trying to offer sensible advice to someone regarding a potential health risk and you belittle and laugh it off like a playground bully. I could list many, many things that people did/used for a long time that are now realised to be major health concerns. Lead in pipes/paint/fuel, asbestos. Sun exposure. Dust exposure. Alcohol. And that's just a start. Just because people did something in the past does not mean it is a good or healthy thing to do. Traditions only exist because something better or safer has yet to come along.
To Kryten - I am attempting to offer you reasonable advice, and I apologise to you if I may have led to this threads derailment. Spalted beech is a lovely timber and you should not avoid using it. But to have it in frequent contact with moist food (eg cheese) might not be the best course. Google it, collate the evidence and use your own judgment.
And don't forget to post pictures of the finished article, whatever it may be.
Oh, and if you find that it is too soft, you might be able to wick thin superglue to toughen it up.
Cheers,
Adam