A
Anonymous
Guest
Does cutting two fingers off at the last knuckle count? 
Plastic surgery is a modern miracle :wink:
Plastic surgery is a modern miracle :wink:
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greybeard
Established Member
One of my brothers does the injuries for all the family, and he does it completely for free. We don't pay him anything, which is actually jolly generous of him.
In fact, to give him the credit he deserves, his speciality really is having accidents, the injuries are a kind of 'extra', a bonus.
I've been lucky enough to witness (that is of course a very personal use of the words 'lucky' and 'witness' - 'counting my lucky stars' is another appropriate and personal phrase usage that springs to mind!) a few of them, so I can confirm that his appetite for injuries is matched only by his apparent concern that variety is indeed the spice of his injury records.
He's fallen out of or off any vehicle (1 wheeled,2 wheeled, 3 wheeled, etc, all the multiple wheeled things up to about 12) he's ever driven or ridden. Same goes for horse-riding, donkey-riding, pig-riding - most such tumbles more than once, and there must be some others - I know it sounds blase but after the first thirty years or so of these achievements they tend to blur a bit (the first on record was - predictably - falling out of his pram at about 10 months old I think, and straight onto the concrete path. He's been bouncing ever since I guess) - so I'm not always sure whether it's been done or it's one we're waiting to hear has been done.
He's crashed (that's a different category to just falling off) push-bikes, motor-bikes, a tractor, cars (the first two both belonging to our Dad at the time - not popular moves)(the first time the front suspension collapsed, completely, so not entirely his fault....but he did let slip to me several years later that he might not have been obeying the speed limit, and that he probably didn't have all four wheels actually on the ground. The second time he was run over - literally - by a lorry while he was innocently waiting at some traffic lights, at least that's what he told us. That's one I didn't witness). Just for clarity, 'crashed' means written-off, although I think the tractor might have been revived. Oh yes he crashed a boat too, but it was a very old boat or so he said. Anyhow, he sunk it, half-drowning himself in the process and of course catching some 'orrible bug-thing from the vast quantities of filthy river-water he swallowed.
When he's been awake he's fallen out of trees and windows, when he's been asleep he's fallen from the top bunk of bunk beds (scared me silly that one, I witnessed it cos I was in the bottom bunk at the time - missed me but didn't half whack the ladder and bottom of the bunk frame, metal of course! Blood everywhere as usual.
All the usuals - stepped on nail (I saw that one, came right through his welly), fell face down onto not quite completely rusted away fence post which gave him a beautiful circular scar all around his eye, fell off slides (when park slides were real big metal monsters surrounded by non-bouncy tarmac!), spun off roundabouts, fell out of car as it drove around a corner (saw that one too, seemingly almost in slow motion, door swung open and out he bounced/flew/rolled), hand shut in car door - twice, first in family to break a big bone, first in family to break same big bone twice.......
Drilled foot, exposed bone in hand with powered wire brush (saw that one, put the first bandage on it!), fell off ladder, fell off garage roof, even fell off the ladder getting back on the garage roof the following weekend....life with my brother has seldom been boring.
But we think - and he agrees - that his best to date has been to be run over by his own lorry. He walked away, it rolled away, he ran back, leapt up to spring off the wheel - like you do to get in the cab - spring, bounce, and open the door - hit the wheel, now rolling of course, at the wrong angle, bounced off but ended under the wheels, two of which ran over him. As we sat and talked about it in the hospital we laughed and laughed - well, you know what I mean - it could have been worse!
So, like I said, he does the injuries, I do the bandages and sympathy.
In fact, to give him the credit he deserves, his speciality really is having accidents, the injuries are a kind of 'extra', a bonus.
I've been lucky enough to witness (that is of course a very personal use of the words 'lucky' and 'witness' - 'counting my lucky stars' is another appropriate and personal phrase usage that springs to mind!) a few of them, so I can confirm that his appetite for injuries is matched only by his apparent concern that variety is indeed the spice of his injury records.
He's fallen out of or off any vehicle (1 wheeled,2 wheeled, 3 wheeled, etc, all the multiple wheeled things up to about 12) he's ever driven or ridden. Same goes for horse-riding, donkey-riding, pig-riding - most such tumbles more than once, and there must be some others - I know it sounds blase but after the first thirty years or so of these achievements they tend to blur a bit (the first on record was - predictably - falling out of his pram at about 10 months old I think, and straight onto the concrete path. He's been bouncing ever since I guess) - so I'm not always sure whether it's been done or it's one we're waiting to hear has been done.
He's crashed (that's a different category to just falling off) push-bikes, motor-bikes, a tractor, cars (the first two both belonging to our Dad at the time - not popular moves)(the first time the front suspension collapsed, completely, so not entirely his fault....but he did let slip to me several years later that he might not have been obeying the speed limit, and that he probably didn't have all four wheels actually on the ground. The second time he was run over - literally - by a lorry while he was innocently waiting at some traffic lights, at least that's what he told us. That's one I didn't witness). Just for clarity, 'crashed' means written-off, although I think the tractor might have been revived. Oh yes he crashed a boat too, but it was a very old boat or so he said. Anyhow, he sunk it, half-drowning himself in the process and of course catching some 'orrible bug-thing from the vast quantities of filthy river-water he swallowed.
When he's been awake he's fallen out of trees and windows, when he's been asleep he's fallen from the top bunk of bunk beds (scared me silly that one, I witnessed it cos I was in the bottom bunk at the time - missed me but didn't half whack the ladder and bottom of the bunk frame, metal of course! Blood everywhere as usual.
All the usuals - stepped on nail (I saw that one, came right through his welly), fell face down onto not quite completely rusted away fence post which gave him a beautiful circular scar all around his eye, fell off slides (when park slides were real big metal monsters surrounded by non-bouncy tarmac!), spun off roundabouts, fell out of car as it drove around a corner (saw that one too, seemingly almost in slow motion, door swung open and out he bounced/flew/rolled), hand shut in car door - twice, first in family to break a big bone, first in family to break same big bone twice.......
Drilled foot, exposed bone in hand with powered wire brush (saw that one, put the first bandage on it!), fell off ladder, fell off garage roof, even fell off the ladder getting back on the garage roof the following weekend....life with my brother has seldom been boring.
But we think - and he agrees - that his best to date has been to be run over by his own lorry. He walked away, it rolled away, he ran back, leapt up to spring off the wheel - like you do to get in the cab - spring, bounce, and open the door - hit the wheel, now rolling of course, at the wrong angle, bounced off but ended under the wheels, two of which ran over him. As we sat and talked about it in the hospital we laughed and laughed - well, you know what I mean - it could have been worse!
So, like I said, he does the injuries, I do the bandages and sympathy.
mudman
Established Member
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My God, and I thought I was bad! :shock:
Inspector
Nyuck, Nyuck, Nyuck!
At work, in addition to my inspection duties, I am one of the First Aid Attendants. All cuts, slivers, sprains, etc., are recorded. If the injured come in for a "band aid" and doesn't want to have it recorded, I'll record it after they leave and make a notation stating that fact.
The reason I encourage reporting and recording all injuries, is that if the injury gets worse it can be disputed by the Company (He did it at home.) and Worksafe BC may not accept the claim. The reason I record the "real tough guys" is to cover my *** in the event they claim later and say they saw First Aid and there isn't an 'Accident Report' in the book.
If you want to be a hero or think you're manly by not reporting, treating, or taking care of your injuries go right ahead, just don't whine about it later on. Try to remember someday your sore back may turn out to be a slipped disc, that turns into a life long problem, you won't get coverage for.
The smart worker is the one that takes the steps to protect themselves from injuries and exposure to hazards. Not the tough one that can endure the suffering! It applies to professionals and nonprofessionals alike.
While the original poster may/may not be an incredible woodworker, his definitions for injuries should only be used by twits.
Bandages ready and the gloves (latex) are on! \/
The reason I encourage reporting and recording all injuries, is that if the injury gets worse it can be disputed by the Company (He did it at home.) and Worksafe BC may not accept the claim. The reason I record the "real tough guys" is to cover my *** in the event they claim later and say they saw First Aid and there isn't an 'Accident Report' in the book.
If you want to be a hero or think you're manly by not reporting, treating, or taking care of your injuries go right ahead, just don't whine about it later on. Try to remember someday your sore back may turn out to be a slipped disc, that turns into a life long problem, you won't get coverage for.
The smart worker is the one that takes the steps to protect themselves from injuries and exposure to hazards. Not the tough one that can endure the suffering! It applies to professionals and nonprofessionals alike.
While the original poster may/may not be an incredible woodworker, his definitions for injuries should only be used by twits.
Bandages ready and the gloves (latex) are on! \
/
superunknown
Established Member
I am scared to go back in the workshop after reading that lot! :?
The idea of any type of injury from a spinning blade scares me stupid. I have had more than my share of splinters from oak, cuts from chisels and the worst in recent years was slipping with a Japanese saw and needing stitches.
Be safe.
The idea of any type of injury from a spinning blade scares me stupid. I have had more than my share of splinters from oak, cuts from chisels and the worst in recent years was slipping with a Japanese saw and needing stitches.
Be safe.
Senior and Tim said -
SNAP
my boss at the time just said to me,
"can you still walk ?" like an edjet I said "I think so "
after looking at my leg I "found a few holes" - just a flesh wound before he fainted from seeing MY blood ! :shock: at least I managed to get a day or 2 off, still got some bits of crap in there - as I call it now its my weather leg
SNAP
my boss at the time just said to me,
"can you still walk ?" like an edjet I said "I think so "
after looking at my leg I "found a few holes" - just a flesh wound before he fainted from seeing MY blood ! :shock: at least I managed to get a day or 2 off, still got some bits of crap in there - as I call it now its my weather leg
A
Anonymous
Guest
tim":2ors4gdi said:
What was it Tim, a bank job gone wrong :shock:
tim
Established Member
senior":39bekonp said:
Not for me but kind of for the others. Very naughty chinese smuggler types bringing things that they shouldn't have been into Hong Kong. They needed telling off but wouldn't listen....
Cheers
Tim
A
Anonymous
Guest
Sometimes people record to much info.
A
Anonymous
Guest
My Dad and Grandad started me young with axe's (age 5), knives and air rifle's (age 8 ), shot gun's (age 12), etc and taught me to not fool about or they would clip my ear, and they taught me to be responsible and careful. It was a good un-nannyfied non feminist PC way, it stuck with me and I'm not bragging (just thankful) I've had no major accidents in the years since. One time I did let a gouge slip (try not to use sharp tools if your tired, in a bad mood, or both) into my left hand, and I had to have hospital treatment for that. Also a few minor gashe's and so on from plate glass in the window factory (you'd expect that in a 6 year stretch!!) Oh I remember I had to get some molten metal removed from my eye it was stuck to it and they had to give it a local anasthetic then use magnetic needles to remove it, oh and another time I walked into a blokes garage, he had a saw sticking out from a shelf bang on my eye level so I never saw it, I walked into it next thing theres like a red curtain and I cant see. My right eyeball was pierced. No lasting damage fortunately. The molten metal was down to me wearing no goggles when grinding, the other was down to the bloke being a daft careless ****. I did pinch my thumb in a hydraulic pallet stripping machine, it was just like a tom and jerry cartoon scene, the blood blister sprouted up as I watched. They used a soldering iron to burn a hole to relieve the pressure :lol:
Come to think of it every accident I've had was down to ME being a daft careless **** :lol:
Come to think of it every accident I've had was down to ME being a daft careless **** :lol:
Lord Nibbo
Established Member
Only one woodwork related injury about 30 years ago. doing exactly what I was shown never to do I put a 1/4" mortice chisel about an inch into my wrist, pulled it out and blood spurted out about two foot into the air, I sat down and promptly fainted. When I came round my head hurt more than my wrist. Never bothered going to have stitches I just wrapped my wrist tight and waited about an hour, when I looked again at the wound it didn't leak, so it was ok. I've still got the scar which I show people when I see them using chisels incorrectly.
Roger
Established Member
:?: :?: :?:
Lee Brubaker
Established Member
Some these posts have certainly been attention getters. The two accidents that I can relate did not occur to me & happened during woodworking classes at school.
The first was a kickback due to a knot at a shaper dropping the youngsters right hand into the cutter. I will never forget the scream or the fact that they were picking up finger bone particles in the shop over the next few weeks.
The second accident was not so serious...but could have been. I was turning a spindle at one of the lathes in a bank of lathes. Another lad was working behind me. Suddenly I hear this kind of muffled choking behind me and turn around. The twit was wearing a tie & he pinched it between the work & his chisel. The lathe promptly wound up the tie on the work yanking his head down to the tool rest & he could not reach the off switch.
Ran around & shut off the lathe, unwound him & laid him on the floor. The shop instructor arrived & had a devil of a time cutting off the tie, all the while the victim is turning blue. Finally the tie is off & color began to return to his face. He was lucky the lathe did not break his neck but he could not speak well for almost a month.
Lee
The first was a kickback due to a knot at a shaper dropping the youngsters right hand into the cutter. I will never forget the scream or the fact that they were picking up finger bone particles in the shop over the next few weeks.
The second accident was not so serious...but could have been. I was turning a spindle at one of the lathes in a bank of lathes. Another lad was working behind me. Suddenly I hear this kind of muffled choking behind me and turn around. The twit was wearing a tie & he pinched it between the work & his chisel. The lathe promptly wound up the tie on the work yanking his head down to the tool rest & he could not reach the off switch.
Ran around & shut off the lathe, unwound him & laid him on the floor. The shop instructor arrived & had a devil of a time cutting off the tie, all the while the victim is turning blue. Finally the tie is off & color began to return to his face. He was lucky the lathe did not break his neck but he could not speak well for almost a month.
Lee
Does being sick on my PC count?
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