light hearted

[Travis]

I bet I could quit gambling
What if there were no hypothetical situations?
It's not my fault I don't take responsibility for my actions
As I said before, I’ll only say this once.
This statement is false.
Don't you hate rhetorical questions?
God, I want patience, and I WANT IT NOW!
Sorry, I forgot all about the Amnesia Conference!
The creation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance.
I can resist everything except temptation.
I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
Never believe generalisations.
Avoid alliterations always.
I used to be schizophrenic, but we're OK now
Thank God I'm an atheist.
Just say NO to negativity


Travis

 

[Michael7]

Thanks Travis

And also here are some lines I have gathered up here and there. Quite a few are from this site:-

Only dead fish go with the flow
The man who never made a mistake never made anything
Less than a man, but bigger than an insect
Always judge a man by the way he treats someone who is of no use to him
God made man before woman so as to give him time to think of an answer for her first question
All the gear no idea
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke
In failing to prepare you are preparing to fail...
The only way to remove temptation, is to give in to it
If you can keep your head when all about are losing theirs - then you haven't understood the seriousness of the situation!
I seek not to know the answers, but to understand the questions.
I don't know what i'm doing but i'll have a go
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same
Beauty is only a light switch away
I got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.
If I was an expert I wouldn't be askin silly questions
If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer!
These are my principles,if you don't like them ,i have others.
It only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth.
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
If its true and we learn from our mistakes... I must be a genius.
It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt
I wish I was a glow worm.A glow worm's never glum.'Cos how can you be grumpy when the sun shines out your bum!

Michael.

 

[Noel]

I try and avoid cliches like the plague.

 

[RogerM]

If at first you don't succeed, tell yourself there is no need.

The boy stood on the burning deck, his pocket full of crackers. A spark flew up his trouser leg and blasted off his n*****s.

Simple Simon met a pieman going to the fair. Said Simple Simon to the pieman, "What have you got there?" " Pies you blithering *****!!"

 

[lanemaux]

From a Hienlien novel : a politician in his speech says " I look forward to a time when everyone in this great state makes an above average income" and nobody laughed.
Mike

 

[devonwoody]

Sounds like we have some teenagers problems around here.

 

[Benchwayze]

The one thing I can't tolerate is intolerance.

If you are keeping your head whilst all those about you are losing theirs...

Land your helicopter somewhere else.