Book of excuses?

[stuartpaul]

I think I'm in trouble!! :shock:

Having just spent a 'fraction' more than I should have on some kit SWMBO will need to be pacified.

I was thinking along the lines of 'you know I really need this to finish that set of boxes I'm making for you'. or 'It was a real bargain and I will be using it lots and lots to make things for you'.

These feel a bit lame and I'm in need of serious help and support.

All suggestions gratefully received!!

 

[Chris Knight]

All these excuses tend to be one-off in nature. Much better to put it down to your nature - "Look I am not an alcoholic or a gambler but I am a tool fetishist". This way, future exigencies are catered for!

Of course the more foibles you have, the more difficult this is to carry off..

 

[frank]

stuartpaul i dont think your in trouble ,your in deep doo da .
how to pacify the good lady well you can take it back and spend the money on her :shock: (sorry wandered a bit then )
you can offer to take her christmas shopping (is the toy er tool worth all that going from shop to shop ) :-k :-k
just give her a peck on the cheek and ask how long your tea will be as you want to try your new tool out :lol: :lol: :sign3:
then we can watch the war on the telly :twisted: :twisted:

frank

 

[Alf]

Tsk. Really a little preparatory groundwork would have helped in this sort of case. Mentioning the usefullness of tool X months beforehand. Repeatedly. Finding the highest possible price for it and showing it to the LOYL. Repeatedly. Then the day of triumph. "Remember that burfl, dear? Look what I got! And you won't believe how much I saved". Essentially it's the softening up process that's the key; almost getting her to the point where she feels it's as inevitable an expense as servicing the car of the mortgage repayment. Probably best not to mention those last two to her when you break the news, btw...

Cheers, Alf

 

[Adam]

All suggestions gratefully received!!

Don't stop now - she'll get the upper hand on the guilt thing. Dont even bat an eyelid at it and explain its normal monthly household outgoing. Buy even more stuff, blow the budget and some every month. In six months you'll either be A) divorced or B) got her to stage when she just rolls her eyes when you stagger in under the weight of the latest delivery.

Serious other suggestions is get everything down from the loft and e-bay it.

Adam

 

[Gill]

Could you claim that you bought more than one item, but you'd rather not discuss it with Christmas being so near?

Gill

 

[LyNx]

I'm with Alf on this one. You need to think ahead, sell it . . . . really sell it. And then, when the time comes, either they understand the "it's a deal, it's a steal, it's the sale of the century", or they are so P'ed off with you talking about it, they just tell you to get it

Works for me........well............everytime :wink: :wink: :wink:

Andy, who's now on the bandsaw note

 

[llangatwgnedd]

I think they are putting something in the drinking water down in Dorset.

 

[stuartpaul]

I must admit to liking Alf's suggestion the most. Unfortunately the 'crime' has been committed and I'm now really looking for mitigating circumstances (m'lud!!).

Frank - there is absolutely no way on this earth that I'm going Christmas shopping with her. No, no , no, no, no, no - it Just aint gonna happen. (this of course means it is the most likely course of events!!)

Gill, - only problem with your approach is I'll actually have to go out and (gulp) buy her something!!

Adam may have a point in selling stuff!! - anyone want a very good condition routalift?

That would get me out of the immediate doo doo's and I can then take the Alf approach

 

[martyn2]

I think they are putting something in the drinking water down in Dorset.

not truth serum anyway

I have to go with Alfs suggestion all the way its work on me and not for me for years :? latest ploy was "look at these kitchens" costing about 5-6k and in the end "you can do it yourself so much cheaper and better" and i fall for it every time.

:idea: got it dopey juice in the water just affects men :!:

Martyn

 

[StevieB]

Well, we need a bit more information first! Define 'fraction', tell us what you have got rather than posting secret drive by gloats, and tell us what size it is :lol: If its small I tend to sneak it into the WS and pretend its been there for years (what do you mean you have never seen that table saw before - its always been there!)

Basic rule of thumb - if you do not prepare the ground before its ordered its going to cost you twice as much when it arrives as a surprise. Be like a kiddie at christmas and go for the pester power approach. Works for me, but then SWMBO says I am just a big kid anyway...... Other line I sometimes take is 'I may be sad and sit in my shed in the evenings and at weekends, but at least you know where I am and that I'm not out on the town misbehaving'. That sometimes works, although for maximum effect should be used when the husband of one of SWMBOs friends has done something daft involving alcohol, another woman or the rugby club.

Steve.

 

[Philly]

Personally, I've convinced the wife I have a split personality. Means I can get away with twice the damage, as well as blaming the "other" one for ordering stuff! :lol: :roll:
Maybe it is the water....
Philly

 

[RogerS]

Sadly, for me, being married to a first-rate psychologist, none of the aforementioned excuses will work for me as she sees them coming even before I think of them.

 

[Philly]

Darn, Roger. My commiserations :lol:
Philly

 

[martyn2]

what a challange you could always try the truth :shock: bet she wount belive you :? or use phillys menthod but she will cure you of that

your right you carnt win

martyn

 

[Anonymous]

I always go for the sumliminal approach. For example "How are you today?" becomes "How are you today.Really need a new lathe" with the last bit in lowered tones.
Usually gets the response "What was that you said?"
To which I respond "Just asking if you had a good day dear"

This done over a period determined byt he price of the tool usually works well for me.

 

[Taffy Turner]

No, no, no!!!

You have all got the wrong approach!!!

Attack is the best form of defence. What you need to do is announce that you are off on a stag / hen * weekend with all of your mates. It is a long weekend, and it is being held in Ibiza!

When she / he * is talking to you again, you gradually start to give ground, to the point where you say "If it bothers you that much, then I won't go".

This is the point where you mention your desired purchase. If you have carried out the above steps correctly, TLOYL will actually purchase said tool for you, and you still come out of it smelling or roses as you have sacrificed your weekend away with the boys / girls *.

* - delete as appropriate to your gender / sexual orientation etc....

Regards

Taffy (who enjoys living life right on the ragged edge!!!)

PS - I take no responsibility for any marital disharmony / bodily injury caused by the incorrect application of the above technique!!!

 

[stuartpaul]

Well, we need a bit more information first! Define 'fraction', tell us what you have got rather than posting secret drive by gloats, and tell us what size it is

Wasn't a drive by gloat I assure you!!

Biscuit jointer had gone phut and I had 'approval' for a new one up to about £50. The Trend one was just to nice to miss and at (coughs quietly) £134 was a bargain!!

I'm also trying the 'it will last me a lifetime' argument!

So in effect I'm looking at gaining £84 worth of 'credit'.

PLEASE NOTE: do not under any circumstances post details of a cheaper one (unless you're prepared to make an offer for the routalift :wink: )!!!!!

 

[Alf]

Ouch. More than twice the approved budget? Youse in the poo-poo right enough. :shock:

Still, you could try pointing out the whole purchase has caused your post count to top 50 and you're therefore now officially a "woodworker". Who says a new tool can't make you a better woodworker? :wink:

Cheers, Alf

 

[ByronBlack]

Can't you just lie and say that it was on special offer for £50?

I've used this diversion tactic many times, when I bought the Jet bandsaw, I said it was only £300 when in fact it was about double, but SHMBO doesn't know enough about it to know the truth or to find out about it.

When I was browsing the axminster website and she saw my bandsaw for the real price, my response was 'oh, thats a much more powerful industrial version' - snigger snigger.

Works each time, i'm now currently thinking through the said tactic to purchase a table saw.