brianhabby
Established Member
"Look, officer, I'm not being a smartass. All I'm sayin' is if you caught me then you were speeding too".
regards
Brian
regards
Brian
Speeding
- Thread starter brianhabby
- Start date
Help Support UKworkshop.co.uk:
Phil Pascoe
Established Member
No answer to that, really.
tomatwark
Established Member
Remember reading somewhere about a the police pulling up a car for speeding and asking the driver " Who do you think you are Stirling Moss ?"
The answer was " Yes " They had stopped Stirling Moss.
The answer was " Yes " They had stopped Stirling Moss.
selectortone
Still waking up not dead in the morning
Many years ago a good friend of mine was stopped by the police on the M5 for speeding in his brand new company car. When asked what speed he thought he was doing (it was well over the speed limit) he replied that he had been taking it easy as it was a new car and he was running it in. Plod was NOT amused.
bugbear
Established Member
selectortone":okp8au9e said:
Running off at the mouth when you're nicked. Always a good move.
It works OK on the Dukes of Hazard, but I don't think that's a documentary.
BugBear
Walney Col
Established Member
It was a TV advert. I remember it well.tomatwark":2guqyjyp said:
Cheshirechappie
Established Member
There is a story told (probably apocryphal) of a young lady travelling with some speed - though overtaken by a number of other drivers - along a motorway, until the inevitable blue lights appeared. Stopped on the hard shoulder, the officer approached her car and said, "I suppose you know why we've stopped you, madam?" To which the young lady replied tartly, "Yes officer. It's because you couldn't catch up with the others."
DiscoStu
Established Member
A mate of mine is a traffic officer with the Met. He says that the attitude test is always the first thing to pass!
Have you noticed you're often asked if you know why you've been pulled over? Always best to say because I was speeding and if asked if you know what speed tell the officer. That way they know that you were alert and aware of what you were doing. You may have made a bad decision but at least you're not trying to lie to the officer who already knows what you were doing! You then need to try and justify your speed, but again best to be humble and apologetic.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Have you noticed you're often asked if you know why you've been pulled over? Always best to say because I was speeding and if asked if you know what speed tell the officer. That way they know that you were alert and aware of what you were doing. You may have made a bad decision but at least you're not trying to lie to the officer who already knows what you were doing! You then need to try and justify your speed, but again best to be humble and apologetic.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
A piece of red tarmac and a piece of black tarmac in a bar arguing over who is the hardest:
Red tarmac - "I'm hard, me! They put me down at bus stops so huge heavy buses can stop without skidding"
Black tarmac - "I'm harder! They put me down on motorways and thousands of vehicles a day run over me."
Just then a piece of green tarmac walked in.
The barman whispered frantically "Shut up you two this guy is a nutter and really is hard. He's a cycle path!
Red tarmac - "I'm hard, me! They put me down at bus stops so huge heavy buses can stop without skidding"
Black tarmac - "I'm harder! They put me down on motorways and thousands of vehicles a day run over me."
Just then a piece of green tarmac walked in.
The barman whispered frantically "Shut up you two this guy is a nutter and really is hard. He's a cycle path!
Fatboy
Established Member
I got stopped one moring doing 90 on a dual carriageway; he pulled me over into a layby about 200m from the roundabout at the end of the stretch. When he asked me why I was driving at that speed on that stretch of road I replied I was slowing down for the roundabout. I wasn't trying to be a smartarse, it was nerves and just the first thing that came into my mind. I got away with a stern b*ll*cking while he was trying not to laugh.
treeturner123
Established Member
Many years ago a friend of mine was stopped by the police in the centre of Worcester; he was speeding but it was approx. 3.00AM. The officer gave him a severe talking to including the immortal words '..You're a danger to other road users and pedestrians'. On looking round, there was a man with his fishing tackle disappearing towards the river and NO-ONE ELSE. My friend had a great deal of difficulty stopping himself from bursting out laughing!
Phil
Phil
Whilst a little "off topic", this is still about speed. This thread reminds me of a story told by a USAF flying instructor we had at RAF Cranwell in the mid 1970's. He told how in the Vietnam war he was briefed to do a photo recce of the railway marshalling yards in Hanoi in a Thunderchief which meant flying in at low level, arriving at dawn and popping up to 2000 ft and flying straight and level with the cameras running at 300 knots which was more or less an invitation to commit suicide. On arrival he acted as briefed and all hell broke lose with flak and surface to air missiles filling the sky with lead, so self preservation kicked in and he gave it full power, dived for the trees and legged it for home.
The photo Intel guys were confused by the strange streaks on the film until someone had the idea of compressing them horizontally which revealed some very poor but recognisable images. So John was wheeled into the bosses office and stood to attention.
"Capt White. You were briefed to do your run over the target at 2000 ft and 300 knots. The photo Intel boys tell me you were below 100 ft doing over 700 knots. Why?"
Long pause while John thought about it. Then eventually in his slow Texas drawl he said " Well sir, because that's all I could get out of her!"
The photo Intel guys were confused by the strange streaks on the film until someone had the idea of compressing them horizontally which revealed some very poor but recognisable images. So John was wheeled into the bosses office and stood to attention.
"Capt White. You were briefed to do your run over the target at 2000 ft and 300 knots. The photo Intel boys tell me you were below 100 ft doing over 700 knots. Why?"
Long pause while John thought about it. Then eventually in his slow Texas drawl he said " Well sir, because that's all I could get out of her!"
DiscoStu
Established Member
A friend of mine used to work in the Canadian rockies and use to haul huge loads. He used to go up some pass that was a 1:5. After a few years in the job some bean counter decided that they could get wagons with much smaller engines. The first time my mate was driving that route he got pulled over.
Officer: "Son do you think you could go any quicker, you're holding up all the traffic"
My mate "Well officer I could go quicker but it is company policy that I remain in the vehicle!"
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Officer: "Son do you think you could go any quicker, you're holding up all the traffic"
My mate "Well officer I could go quicker but it is company policy that I remain in the vehicle!"
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
BREAKING NEWS
Police in Tottenham last night pulled over a local lad and were amazed to find the car taxed M.O.T. tested and insured. It wasn't stolen and there was no stolen goods or drugs found. The driver was sober. He had a full license and no points.
A police spokesman said they had no option but to fine him £80 for wasting police time.
Police in Tottenham last night pulled over a local lad and were amazed to find the car taxed M.O.T. tested and insured. It wasn't stolen and there was no stolen goods or drugs found. The driver was sober. He had a full license and no points.
A police spokesman said they had no option but to fine him £80 for wasting police time.
monkeybiter
Established Member
The last time I was done was in a reduced speed section of motorway [50Mph signs] as I drove the 10 miles from where I live to get to my son who was breathless with chest pains. I beat the ambulance.
DiscoStu
Established Member
I confess I have reached over 130mph in a medical emergency, what I couldn't understand was how the car behind me kept up and if he too had a medical emergency to go to.
In my younger days I got pulled for doing 36mph in a 30mph limit about 50 yards before it went to a 60mph limit and that was a 2am.
This was near Southampton and I had to produce my licence. I went into my local station in London and the officer there thought I must have been abusive to the officer. I explained I wasn't and was polite and he just couldn't believe anyone was getting done for 36mph especially at 2am.
He even photocopied the ticket to put up on their notice board for the rest of the officers to have a laugh at.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
In my younger days I got pulled for doing 36mph in a 30mph limit about 50 yards before it went to a 60mph limit and that was a 2am.
This was near Southampton and I had to produce my licence. I went into my local station in London and the officer there thought I must have been abusive to the officer. I explained I wasn't and was polite and he just couldn't believe anyone was getting done for 36mph especially at 2am.
He even photocopied the ticket to put up on their notice board for the rest of the officers to have a laugh at.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
tomatwark
Established Member
I had a derestricted moped which would do about 55-60 instead of the 35 it was meant to do, one day this police bike came up behind when I was happy going along at 55 and was just about to pull me over when from nowhere another bike went flying past us both and off he went after it, I thought phew that was lucky.
I pulled up onto the drive outside my house and was just getting off, when who should pull up along side me but the police bike, who proceeded to give me a ticket
, he had done a PNC check.
I pulled up onto the drive outside my house and was just getting off, when who should pull up along side me but the police bike, who proceeded to give me a ticket
, he had done a PNC check.
AJB Temple
Finely figured
One of my most treasured memories as a teenager was I suppose in the late 70's watching police pull onto the Warwick by pass in some marked up patrol car in an effort to catch some guy in a Porsche 911. The Porsche guy floored it and put space between him and plod faster than I ever though possible. No idea what happened in the end.
More recently, I was on my motorbike commute home through Wandsworth (I lived in Surrey at the time) and coming the other way towards me was a kin on a moped pulling a perfect wheelie for easily 200 yards. He was oblivious to the police bike following him serenely about 20 yards behind. I would like to think the police just told him off. His skills were damn good.
More recently, I was on my motorbike commute home through Wandsworth (I lived in Surrey at the time) and coming the other way towards me was a kin on a moped pulling a perfect wheelie for easily 200 yards. He was oblivious to the police bike following him serenely about 20 yards behind. I would like to think the police just told him off. His skills were damn good.
