Replying to "For Sale" PMs

[Max Power]

What is the normal procedure for replying to PMs regarding items for sale?
I made an offer of 90% of the asking price for a router offered for sale by
jed mc571 on friday. I waited all weekend for a response , assuming the vendor must be away for the weekend or whatever. THe item was then marked as sold late last night. Surely if items are to be offered for sale with offers by pm only then it is only common courtesy to acknowledge the offer. :roll:

 

[wizer]

I agree, it's annoying. Etiquette can not be enforced on an internet forum.

 

[peter99]

I think it's because some people offer for sale by pm only (not open forum). ie replies on the open forum are seen by all, everyone can see who offers the asking price first (or who puts a lower offer in). It's then no prob for the seller to sell to the first asking price offered or accept the lower offer. No arguments, it's there for all to see. Then pm's can be exchanged for addresses etc. That's the fair way.

Pm only sale means the seller can wait and see the offers coming in, and if , say 5 offers to buy at the asking price arrive over the weekend but one lets say is able to pick up rather than having to post then thats easier for the seller so he accepts that offer. Never mind it might have been the 5th message received so unfair to the first 4. N one sees that except the seller (NOT saying thats the case with the seller mentioned in this thread though).

 

[jedmc571]

Apologies for any inconvenience caused.

Alan, in response to your post

I had a number of offers, and never replied to any of those saying it was sold, and I also never asked for "Offers"
The price I asked was fair for that particular item, however, that was not the reason I didn't reply.

With multiple offers it was simpler to post it as "SOLD"

And, If we are talking of etiquette, I, and all other posters would thank you to not splash it all over the forum, as I specifically stated "PM's" only.

Again, my apologies

Regards

Jed

 

[kasandrich]

I think it's because some people offer for sale by pm only (not open forum). ie replies on the open forum are seen by all, everyone can see who offers the asking price first (or who puts a lower offer in). It's then no prob for the seller to sell to the first asking price offered or accept the lower offer. No arguments, it's there for all to see. Then pm's can be exchanged for addresses etc. That's the fair way.

Pm only sale means the seller can wait and see the offers coming in, and if , say 5 offers to buy at the asking price arrive over the weekend but one lets say is able to pick up rather than having to post then thats easier for the seller so he accepts that offer. Never mind it might have been the 5th message received so unfair to the first 4. N one sees that except the seller (NOT saying thats the case with the seller mentioned in this thread though).

But in terms of etiquette, it would be nice for the seller to reply to unsuccessfull buyer pm's/offers informing them they had been unsuccessfull, before posting on open forum "SOLD", but in my humble opinion this is typical of the breakdown of the fabric of our society, everybody is becoming more and more self centered, I think the world would be a better place if we all cared for one another more.

Has anybody ever heard the theory that Heaven and Hell are exactly the same, there are long tables with people sat each side, and an absolutely wonderfull feast laid out on the table, the only catch is that you may only eat with the cutlery provided and the forks are 6 feet long, in Hell they all sit trying to get food into their own mouths with the 6 foot forks, but of course they are unable, thats Hell, In Heaven they have exactly the same but they feed each other across the table and everybody eats their fill and is happy.

 

[head clansman]

hi


um sold means, your pm was not the first and you have been unsuccessful, until money changes hands from the first person to pm the seller he can't possible say one way or the other that it's been sold, if the first buyer fall through then the seller moves on to the second bid so on & so on down the line. hc

 

[big soft moose]

But in terms of etiquette, it would be nice for the seller to reply to unsuccessfull buyer pm's/offers informing them they had been unsuccessfull, before posting on open forum "SOLD", but in my humble opinion this is typical of the breakdown of the fabric of our society, everybody is becoming more and more self centered, I think the world would be a better place if we all cared for one another more.

.

to an extent you are right , but i think the expectation on behalf of the buyer that they will recieve a personal reply is also a bit self centred - its not asking much that people should assume that they are unsuccesful unless they hear differently, whereas if the seller has numerous pms it would be asking quite a lot that he sent personal replies to each one.

I agree that it is poor ettiquette to just leave potential buyers hanging indefinitely , but to be fair jed hasnt done that as he has clearly indicated that the item as gone by his sold post.

 

[matt]

There are so many different ways that people interact with each other now where, in some circles, even an insult is a term of endearment. I don't think you can be prescriptive about how you expect to be treated on an open forum of all places.

I see nothing wrong with how Jed responded - to be honest I prefer his approach as I don't waste my time visiting my PM Inbox for pleasantries. By contrast it is clear that other have different expectations. What is a person to do?

I think we all just have to accept that not being treated in the way we expect is nothing more than the differences that prevail in society (and always have...) and just move on.

 

[kasandrich]

But in terms of etiquette, it would be nice for the seller to reply to unsuccessfull buyer pm's/offers informing them they had been unsuccessfull, before posting on open forum "SOLD", but in my humble opinion this is typical of the breakdown of the fabric of our society, everybody is becoming more and more self centered, I think the world would be a better place if we all cared for one another more.

.

to an extent you are right , but i think the expectation on behalf of the buyer that they will recieve a personal reply is also a bit self centred - its not asking much that people should assume that they are unsuccesful unless they hear differently, whereas if the seller has numerous pms it would be asking quite a lot that he sent personal replies to each one.

I agree that it is poor ettiquette to just leave potential buyers hanging indefinitely , but to be fair jed hasnt done that as he has clearly indicated that the item as gone by his sold post.

If we are to work by assumption, and someone were to pm offering the asking price, then SOLD appears on the forum, would it be reasonable for that person to assume they are the one who has bought it?

Years ago if you applied for a job, and were unsccussfull, you would always get a reply, politely declining your services. In this day and age of computing when it is simpler and easier to produce a personalised letter with the same content, you rarely get a reply if your application is unsuccessfull. In my opinion this is a step backwards.

 

[peter99]

Jed, just to be clear, my comment was a general reply and wasn't in any way inferring you did or did not do anything in particular or aimed at your particular transaction.

To be honest if the item was worth the cash I can't see the point in offering 90%, May as well buy it for the asking price cause someone else surely will as happened here.

Enjoy the money

 

[Karl]

If we are to work by assumption, and someone were to pm offering the asking price, then SOLD appears on the forum, would it be reasonable for that person to assume they are the one who has bought it?

No.

Unless you receive a PM telling you that you were successful, how else would you swap details re: payment and delivery?

Cheers

Karl

 

[big soft moose]

But in terms of etiquette, it would be nice for the seller to reply to unsuccessfull buyer pm's/offers informing them they had been unsuccessfull, before posting on open forum "SOLD", but in my humble opinion this is typical of the breakdown of the fabric of our society, everybody is becoming more and more self centered, I think the world would be a better place if we all cared for one another more.

.

to an extent you are right , but i think the expectation on behalf of the buyer that they will recieve a personal reply is also a bit self centred - its not asking much that people should assume that they are unsuccesful unless they hear differently, whereas if the seller has numerous pms it would be asking quite a lot that he sent personal replies to each one.

I agree that it is poor ettiquette to just leave potential buyers hanging indefinitely , but to be fair jed hasnt done that as he has clearly indicated that the item as gone by his sold post.

If we are to work by assumption, and someone were to pm offering the asking price, then SOLD appears on the forum, would it be reasonable for that person to assume they are the one who has bought it?

Years ago if you applied for a job, and were unsccussfull, you would always get a reply, politely declining your services. In this day and age of computing when it is simpler and easier to produce a personalised letter with the same content, you rarely get a reply if your application is unsuccessfull. In my opinion this is a step backwards.

clearly not as the succesful buyer would recieve a pm - but those who dont hear should assume they are unsucesful, likewise with jobs its not a question of lack of courtesy but a question of volume.

we recently advertised a post for which we had two hundred plus applications - we selected four for interview so by your logic we would have had to send 196 declination letters, which would be both expensive and time consuming. Far simpler to say that if you havent heard by x date then assume you are unsuccesful.

in "the good old days" you probably had fewer applicants both because people were less likely to relocate for work , and because unemployed people werent under pressure from the DHS/DWP to apply for jobs they are clearly unsuited for. (for example of the applicants fo the post in question where the job details clearly stated "must have a full uk driving license" over 20 of the applicants (10%) did not.

If people are going to waste my teams time by applying for jobs they dont have a hope in hell of getting, there is no way i am going to waste yet more time writing back to tell them that their hopeful bulls..t has not cut the ice.

 

[wizer]

Let's not have a bum fight. The common etiquette is to post a 'PM Sent' message in the thread. That indicates communication has occurred but does not mean that someone else can't also PM (and state that in the thread). I do think that the seller should reply to their PM's. But at very least, once a deal has been struck, the seller should immediately change the title and post that the deal is closed and all bets are off.

But as I said above. There is no way of enforcing etiquette on an internet forum. So let's get on with talking about wood stroking and tool fantasising, yes?

 

[studders]

I can't quite believe that any 'For Sale' post gets so many replies that it makes acknowledging a PM that difficult. That said, if I PM on something I'm interested in but get no reply I tend to assume I've not been succesful. I then make a voodoo doll of the succesful buyer and stick pins in it. :lol:

 

[head clansman]

hi

But at very least, once a deal has been struck, the seller should immediately change the title and post that the deal is closed and all bets are off.

tom's statement says it all. I'm not having a go at you tom, but this statement in one word says SOLD isn't that what jed did . hc

 

[jedmc571]

Hello,

I just returned from an appointment, I couldn't get this out of my head during the journey, so I wanted to add a little more.

A deal was done by PM with a Forum member on Friday evening, we spoke for an hour about it, and had a good chat, I was pleased it was going to a genuinely nice person, who really wanted it, this was subject to cleared funds of course.

I left at 0400 Saturday morning to Ireland for work, I returned this morning.
Last night my wife checked details for me, and confirmed the transaction was done, therefore the item was confirmed as sold, I then asked her to update the post as being "Sold" thus closing it.

When you purchase from Ebay, you don't get a personal reply when you bid, but you do when you win, that's how I was trying to conduct the sale, in private, as it's only the business of those intereseted in it.

Perhaps I could have PM'd everyone back? but I don't have the time.

I'm not sure if you could ever find the perfect way to conduct a sale, someone always finds an issue.

Personally.........I want the price, as much detail as posible, and to be kept private.

I suspect this thread will get quite busy now, everyone has an opinion, we can't go with the general consensus, we just have to get on with our business

Regards

Jed.

 

[wizer]

hi

But at very least, once a deal has been struck, the seller should immediately change the title and post that the deal is closed and all bets are off.

tom's statement says it all. I'm not having a go at you tom, but this statement in one word says SOLD isn't that what jed did . hc

Well I did say that I think PM's should be replied to. I assume it'd been read. It takes but a minute to reply, even just to acknowledge the message.

In this instance, Jed has explained (vaguely) what happened and why.

 

[jedmc571]

In this instance, Jed has explained (vaguely) what happened and why.

Like I said Tom, it's between the seller and the buyer, not for Forum comsumption, that's why it's "vague"

Cheers

Jed

 

[wizer]

buyer(s) Jed

 

[jedmc571]

Yes of course " Buyers"