Pretty miffed at the (lack of) response

[donwatson]

I have been simmering for a couple of days now with this problem. A recent request in Scrolling- Scroll Saws > "Replacing tensioning rod for ferm 1007 scroll saw" made me think I could return some of the help I had been shown on this site over the years. I knew I had some pieces that various members had sent me over the years and I checked and there was indeed what was needed so I decided to send it to the OP. My fault, I contacted them and got address and postcode, went to the post office and got a proof of purchase and sent it off with a promise that it would be delivered in 3 days. I posted this information on the forum but since then nothing. No thanks, no nothing.
I should have checked the details of this OP, they had just joined that very day and were only looking for something for nothing. I won't make that mistake again.
Rant over, get back to what you should be doing. lol
take care and stay safe
Don W

 

[Doug B]

Don’t let it get to you Don, it happened to me years ago when I sent a chap some chisels foc including postage all I asked was if he could confirm they’d turned up by DM, never heard from him again.
life’s too short to let it get to you just be happy in the knowledge that you’re a decent human being & helped someone out even if they have no manners, sadly there’s a lot of them about.

 

[AES]

I can understand your reaction Don. Me too if it happened to me.

But it never has, so far anyway. Perhaps I've just been lucky. The only thing I can suggest is that before doing your good deed in future, you ask yourself "Do I "know" this poster?" - look at his/her profile if necessary. If the name is familiar (from previous posts, etc) then go right ahead. If not perhaps wait a bit.

In my own case loads of members have helped me, and I've helped a few too - "what goes round comes round" and all that. So thanks from me for all your previous good deeds, please don't let the one bad apple in the barrel ruin your faith in all the rest.

 

[Awac]

Oh, I understand how this burns, when this happens to me I think of this joke, sorry to post it here and not in jokes but it always helps me to think of it, and I hope it will help you. Just know you are the better person.

A little boy is walking down the street with his Father when they happen to see two dogs humping away. The little boy turns to his Father and asks:
"Daddy, what are those two dogs doing?"
The Father who is not unreasonably embarrassed, thinks quickly:
"Well Son, that dog on the back of the other one has a sore paw, and the other one is helping it home."
Little boy thinks for a minute then replies:
"Typical, try to help someone with a good deed and they just end up screwing you"

 

[Daniel2]

It's true; the internet has allowed these bad apples a wider audience.
Don't let it hinder you from continuing to be who, and how, you are.
And try not to dwell on it, Don.
ATB,
Daniel

 

[marcros]

In fairness, he has said thanks now and offered future assistance. He did offer to pay for the postage.

Maybe life just got in the way of logging on instantly to confirm receipt. Give him the benefit of the doubt. I have plenty of jobs where I think that I must do that when I get a chance and they drag on a few days.

 

[D_W]

Been down the same road, don. I'd say 9 out of ten of those types of actions lead to longstanding warm feelings and maybe future exchanges of interesting items from time to time. But similar to you, years ago, I offered someone a Stanley 7 casting and frog when they showed their damaged plane asking for advice on how to fix it. I sent the the frog and casting free and never a peep. I asked them about a month later if they received the casting and frog and all they sent back was a terse message of "of course I did, or I'd have let you know it didn't come".

I learned from that not to send free things to people I don't otherwise know on the board. Not out of spite, but because sometimes you can end up sending things to people who may not really want them that bad.

In my case, the person was a long time forum member who didn't post much, but still around from time to time, and complained they didn't want to spend the cake needed to buy a new plane. Each time they posted after that, all I could think was, "There's the person who can't be bothered to say thanks".

The 9 out of ten other experiences outweigh them by a mile, though.

 

[D_W]

Been on the other side of it, too. Someone sent me a box of stuff they couldn't use, though I didn't ask for any of it. They just said they had stuff they'd never use and knew I'd like. It came with a nice letter about where they got it, etc, and it took me four days to open the box and get back to them and say thanks (I did, but with the few days delay). They were pissed, never explained why, just sent an email that said, "Well, I guess that's that."

 

[Spectric]

Hi

That is one very ungrateful person, for someone to go right out of their way and send something via a post office in the Covid crissis I would be have been over the moon. The sad side is that a bad experience like this puts you off helping someone again and that person could be a genuine nice person and this is in my opinion the big issue with sites like Ebay, to many takers.

 

[artie]

It is not who you helped, or how you helped.
It is that you helped.
And when you need help it will appear.

 

[MikeK]

I've given away tools and bandsaw fences to members of the UKW and I paid the shipping from Germany. While I didn't expect any feedback, I received confirmation of receipt and thanks. Sometimes the confirmation was immediate, and other times it was weeks or months after the item arrived.

Life does get in the way of hobbies, especially now. However, if I had an experience like D_W's, it wouldn't put me off from helping others.

 

[RobinBHM]

I have found people on this forum generally to be most helpful -Ive met a few through visiting to collect stuff and theyve all been most genuine people

Its a shame that few negative experiences can sour that feeling -Ive not had that but Im sorry some have.

 

[Lons]

There are are always some but they are few and far between, most people are honest and genuine so don't let it spoil your outlook on life Don, what goes around usually comes around.

I'd think everyone on here would applaud your efforts.

 

[Blister]

Yep , happened to me as well , Some years ago I was prepaired to donate a lathe , Had a chap say his daughter wanted one and was keen to learn , So They collected , My only request was to show some of the turnings she had made , Some days later the lathe ( That looked like the one I gave away ) was seen on a auction web site , My fault Thinking I was doing someone a good turn
Won't be doing that again

No photos of work ever turned up !

 

[Lons]

That really is a reason to be annoyed Blister.

 

[Glitch]

There are are always some but they are few and far between, most people are honest and genuine so don't let it spoil your outlook on life Don, what goes around usually comes around.

I'd think everyone on here would applaud your efforts.

+1

The OP did get a response eventually, but there was a delay.

The majority of people are good and honest but some will be thoughtless, or take the pee.

 

[Sandyn]

Don't beat yourself up about it, you are the better person for doing it. The world is full of greedy selfish devious people, but what goes around comes around. You will be rewarded and the OP will be punished in some way! I hope it doesn't put you off helping others.

 

[Jester129]

There are many generous people on this forum, there are also way more people around that take the 'p'. It is a fact of life, I'm afraid. Maybe it's because we are of the 'older fraternity' and have 'been there' in the past and can remember what it was like, if you see what I mean? All you can do is be who you are, and not change - you've been like it for x amount of years, after all!

 

[mg123]

Yep , happened to me as well , Some years ago I was prepaired to donate a lathe , Had a chap say his daughter wanted one and was keen to learn , So They collected , My only request was to show some of the turnings she had made , Some days later the lathe ( That looked like the one I gave away ) was seen on a auction web site , My fault Thinking I was doing someone a good turn
Won't be doing that again

No photos of work ever turned up !

"Good turn", lathe...... was it just me who laughed at that?

 

[craigs]

i have given away a few things recently and only had positive responses