Manually-operated agricultural digging implements...

[Steve Maskery]

... otherwise known as Euphemism of the Day.

My wife went shopping today in town, looking for holiday clothes. She also bought me a couple of shirts (as a sop, probably!). She found some she liked, but one was labelled in XL- format, and one in collar sizes. Well, it's years since I bought a collar size, and even I don't know what would fit me, and certainly Judith didn't. So she asked the sales assistant. She reports that the conversation went something like this:

Judith: "If I were to buy one of these [collar size], what would equate to extra-large?"

Sales Assistant: "Err, is Sir tall?"

J: "No, average height."

SA: "Does Sir have girth to accommodate?"

J: "If you mean 'Is he fat?', then the answer is 'Yes'."

Call a spade a spade, why don't you?
S

 

[Anonymous]

Wives can be so cruel

 

[frank]

steve it must be her cooking so its not your fault :wink: (homer)

frank

 

[Steve Maskery]

steve it must be her cooking

HER cooking? She doesn't know the meaning of the word. I cook, Judith de-frosts.

Well I have to contribute something to the domestic economy. It has to be my skills, as it sure ain't my income.

BTW, she bought me a day at a cookery school for my birthday. I'm going to do a Spanish day in a few weeks, don't know much about Spanish, we've not been much. I'm taking my mate Phil. When we go on hols, Phil and I are a formidable pair when we get over a hot stove wearing nothing but a pinny.



Cheers
Steve

PS Any more euphemisms?

 

[Knot Competent]

"Phil and I are a formidable pair when we get over a hot stove wearing nothing but a pinny."

I can't tell you what a HORRIBLE mental picture that gives me! Two of you, in one pinny? Just beware the hot fat and the glowing barbeque grille, eh?

Please can we get back to woodworking? PLEASE?

John

 

[llangatwgnedd]

over a hot stove wearing nothing but a pinny

don't go cooking sausages then

 

[Steve Maskery]

don't go cooking sausages then

Sausages? Nah! I like to be abroad (when I'm not being a bloke ) and no-one makes bangers like us Brits!

 

[Steve Maskery]

Please can we get back to woodworking? PLEASE?

John

I think that's probably a very good idea.

S

 

[PowerTool]

Or there was the old joke about the woman shopping for shirts:-

"What size collar does Sir take,Madam?"

"Err,I've no idea...but I can just get both hands round his neck :twisted: "


Andrew (I'll get my coat..)