Joke thread

[Linus]

 

[Suffolkboy]

..

 

[Doug B]

 

[user 38384]

..View attachment 128444

No income tax, no VAT
No money back, no guarantee
Black or white, rich or broke
We'll cut prices at a stroke……

Luvley jubbly!

 

[AES]

View attachment 128445

Sorry Doug B. Not a chance in hell!! And definitely not while you - and I - inhabit this world mate

 

[dzj]

 

[Doug B]

 

[Daniel2]

View attachment 128467

Aaaahhh.......Nooo !!

 

[user 38384]

 

[Valhalla]

As mentioned here- Another Joke

Please ensure contributions do not contain risqué innuendo or images that might offend, remember and be aware that not everyone has the same sense of humour and a joke you may find funny, may cause insult or offence.
Our members are from a varied demographic, age and gender, please keep that in mind.

Sadly - gone are the days when an Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub and the landlord says "Is this some kind of joke?"

 

[Blackswanwood]

 

[Doug B]

 

[Sachakins]

View attachment 128467

Poured out brown runny stuff in its previous life too

 

[treeturner123]

That's no way to talk about my mother's custard!

Phil

 

[shed9]

Poured out brown runny stuff in its previous life too

Erm............ never mind, you'll figure it out when the time comes....

 

[Doug B]

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 128445

At least Toblerone made their chocolate bars to fit the boxes!

 

[Droogs]

If this little dog was to star in a remake of the Wizard of Oz, it would be a very short movie

 

[Blackswanwood]

 

[Doug B]

On the first day of school, the children brought gifts for their teacher.
The supermarket manager's daughter brought the teacher a basket of assorted fruit.
The florist's son brought the teacher a bouquet of flowers
The candy-store owner's daughter gave the teacher a pretty box of candy.
Then the liquor-store owner's son brought up a big, heavy box. The teacher lifted it up and noticed that it was leaking a little bit.. She touched a drop of the liquid with her finger and tasted it.
"Is it wine?" she guessed. "No," the boy replied. She tasted another drop and asked, "Champagne?”
"No," said the little boy, "It's a puppy.