Joke thread

[Doug B]

 

[GregW]

 

[GregW]

BREXIT development over the years

 

[Amateur]

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 127171

 

[Cozzer]

That's funny.
I've been referring to my wife as "my little midget gem" - she's 5 foot and half an inch - for years, but she's never complained....

 

[dzj]

 

[TRITON]

Its the journey from being a person, to being a snowflake.
1970's yeah so what,1980's, a bit argumentative, 1990's a bit whiny to 2000's full on snowflake and taking pics to show on facebook/twitter to elicit some sympathy.

 

[Doug B]

 

[Robbo3]

A man stops into this little backwoods restaurant for lunch, and after finishing his meal he inquires the way to the rest room. He was told that it's around the back of the building. He heads through the back door, finds the outhouse and takes a ****, only to discover there's no toilet paper. But there is a sign on the wall that reads, 'Wipe yourself with your finger, then insert the finger into this hole, and your finger will be cleaned with great attention'

So the man wipes up and sticks his finger through the hole. On the other side is standing a little boy holding a brick in either hand, who claps them together at the sight of the finger poking through. The guy screams in pain, yanks his hand back, and starts sucking on his finger......

 

[TRITON]

A man stops into this little backwoods restaurant for lunch, and after finishing his meal he inquires the way to the rest room. He was told that it's around the back of the building. He heads through the back door, finds the outhouse and takes a dung, only to discover there's no toilet paper. But there is a sign on the wall that reads, 'Wipe yourself with your finger, then insert the finger into this hole, and your finger will be cleaned with great attention'

So the man wipes up and sticks his finger through the hole. On the other side is standing a little boy holding a brick in either hand, who claps them together at the sight of the finger poking through. The guy screams in pain, yanks his hand back, and starts sucking on his finger......

I heard that one in primary school over 40 years ago

 

[Jameshow]

I heard that one in primary school over 40 years ago

Taking of which...

Daughter ....dad what's your name..... James ..

What's the opposite of yes...... no....

What's in my hands ...... Nothing......

Old ones are best!!!!

 

[Woodchip Wilbur]

Taking of which...
Daughter ....dad what's your name..... James ..
What's the opposite of yes...... no....
What's in my hands ...... Nothing......
Old ones are best!!!!

... if you say so...

 

[Just4Fun]

I heard that one in primary school over 40 years ago

If I had gone to a primary school 40 years ago I would probably have been arrested

 

[Doug B]

 

[Linus]

Has Novak Djokivic set a new world record?

He is the first athlete to have been banned from international competition for NOT taking drugs!

 

[dzj]

 

[Jameshow]

... if you say so...

It was a 5 year old telling it!
As she had just leant it!!

 

[mikej460]

 

[user 38384]