Joke Thread III

[Sachakins]

I can accept the concept, but that the mug can be held by a hoof is stretching the concept a bit for me

 

[Doug B]

 

[mwinfrance]

So that could be a positive or negative reason

I missed this comment..well played that man..well played sir..

 

[Beginner.]

A guy gave up his woodcarving hobby after many years of trying to perfect his skills, he became frustrated that his fruit he made always came out pear shaped

 

[Beginner.]

The most versatile tool in your kit is the one that you grab and throw across the room while yelling ‘Son of a B–ch’ at the top of your voice.

 

[Sachakins]

The most versatile tool in your kit is the one that you grab and throw across the room while yelling ‘Son of a B–ch’ at the top of your voice.

Right up to the point that tool you have in your at the time is your latest brand new Festool EQ Domino machine

 

[Sachakins]

 

[Robbo3]

 

[mwinfrance]

"meglinating" ? ..I'll have to stuart that
Lidl here currently have a special on an "Electric corded Pneumatic / Pneumatique Drill" .
There is no air involved..Standard hammer drill.

 

[Doug B]

 

[JimJay]

Am I the only one who wonders why there isn't a lead on the other battery terminal?

It's an early version of WiFi..

 

[stuart little]

Am I the only one who wonders why there isn't a lead on the other battery terminal?

You're not alone!

 

[Phil Pascoe]

The cartoonist wasn't feeling very positive.

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 161709

View attachment 161710

 

[Doug B]

 

[woodhutt]

A chicken farmer goes into a pub and sits at a stool next to an attractive woman. As the bartender comes forward they both ask for champagne, then turn and laugh.
'What a coincidence,' the woman smiles.
'Yes,' says the farmer. 'I'm celebrating.'
'What a coincidence,' says the woman. 'I'm celebrating too.'
The farmer asks her what she's celebrating and she tells him that she and her husband have been trying for a child for years and today her doctor told her she's pregnant.
'What a coincidence,' says the farmer. 'My chickens haven't produced anything for months but today every one of them laid eggs.'
The woman asks what had occurred to bring that about. 'Simple,' said the farmer. 'I got a new rooster.'
'What a coincidence,' said the woman.

 

[Phil Pascoe]

There is another joke much along the same lines that is more plausible/possible/better.

 

[Vann]

There is another joke much along the same lines that is more plausible/possible/better.

But you're going to leave us hanging...

 

[Phil Pascoe]

No, I just can't remember it.

 

[Just4Fun]

The version I remember is a woman married to a much older man and her Dr is surprised when she becomes pregnant