Joke Thread III

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If it involves harming or violence, to humans or animals, it is not funny, that includes **********, ****, sexism, and racism.
Fun / pleasure is not something that one can have at another beings expense. The name for that is sadism. Or psychopathy.
Saville used to make jokes about what he did frequently saying that his "case comes up next Thursday".
Telling jokes against himself was part of his "hiding in plain site" ( I'm not for a moment saying that was what Doug B was doing )..I saw the post by Doug B ..and also the one which followed it, also about **********. One was removed, one was left in , or missed .
Sexual jokes are not allowed, unless ... ?
Violence towards animals seems to be perfectly acceptable, given the billions of them which are killed in cruel and barbaric circumstances every year. It seems that moral compasses point in the direction which are most convenient for their owners' proclivities....
 
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YES, hear, hear. Maybe it's time for Joke thread IV. I've built up a heap of ':dunno:' waiting for a joke that, "Me no comprende."- again! 😂
Yes, maybe two new joke threads. A joke thread IV and a separate Controversial JokeThread, with restricted access, as per the existing Controversial topics thread. 🤣🤣🤣😱😱😱
 
Cleanest one I could think of....

Our computers went down at the office today, so we had to do everything manually. It took me fifteen minutes to shuffle the cards for Solitaire.

I'll get my coat........😱
 
Cleanest one I could think of....

Our computers went down at the office today, so we had to do everything manually. It took me fifteen minutes to shuffle the cards for Solitaire.

I'll get my coat........😱
Dear sir I take umbridge at this sort of joke it implies that all ofice workers spend their days playing computer games ,yada yada yada 😉
 
Why did the horse cross the road...

To get to it's stable!

(A horse crossed the road today so I cracked my best dad joke for my 8yo daughter grown grown!)
 
Old bloke on a cruise visits a gents toilet in Barbados.
Standing at the urinal he happens to notice the gentleman next to him has letters tattooed on his todger.
" Goodness me, what a coincidence," says the old bloke.
"My wife's called Wendy too!"
"Cool" says the gentleman, but that actually says
"Welcome to Barbados and have a nice day!"

NB
There was no racial implications, or suggestions men in Barbados have long todgers.....
There were no snakes or any other animals ill treated in any way during the telling of this joke.
The old bloke may have been unsteady on his feet as reported to the administrator at the time, but the findings concluded that this was due to the overwhelming toxic atmosphere in the gents toilet at the time caused by the number of males smoking enormous spliffs in the toilet cubicles.
This joke has been passed by the censorship and classified as "U"
This explanation is brought to you curtesy of
" The UK, Ai coropration"
and may or may not be one hundred percent correct for humanoids reading it.
 
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