Joke Thread II

[Blackswanwood]

 

[Doug B]

 

[Morty]

It didn't take her long !!!!!

 

[Pineapple]

Just the right moment 19,20,21

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Obama vs. Trump ?

 

[stuart little]

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[stuart little]

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[stuart little]

It didn't take her long !!!!!View attachment 150579

TThat's enough for today!

 

[bushwhaker]

 

[Stan]

But you have to realise that common sense is perfectly distributed among the population. Do you know  anyone who thinks they need more of it than they already have?

The Dunning-Kruger effect in action!

 

[Cozzer]

Absolutely true story for you. It'll probably mean more to blokes of a certain age....

Now and then, it's suggested that ladies attend a certain clinic in order to make sure that...erm...certain of their parts are working as expected. Apparently it's fair from a pleasant affair - feet up in stirrups, etc., and a specialist nurse performing a task with a variety of equipment.
Yes, it's time to thank God you were born a bloke, methinks....
Anyway, a good few years ago my wife's best friend attended her clinic session. "Christine" was a game lass, and was known for....erm....putting it about a bit. (She once claimed that her GP had had to check certain bits of her, and in true Yorkshire fashion, had exclaimed "My God! That's had some clout!")
But I digress. Christine is seated in the clinic waiting room, understandably nervous, so decides she should go and powder her nose/freshen up down there. Too late, she notices that there's not really enough toilet roll to dry down there properly, so dives into her handbag to find two or three paper tissues to help matters out. As with all female handbags, it's almost bottomless, with lipsticks, purse, receipts, packets of mints and Lord knows what else, but she eventually finds the tissues nestling in the middle. Relieved, she dries herself properly, flushes the wipes away, and returns to the waiting room....
Eventually she's called into the examination room, disrobes, and assumes the rather undignified position on the table. A few seconds into the examination, she heard one of the two nurses utter "Oh! That's interesting..." and saw her reaching for a set of tweezers, carefully retrieving something, and placing it in a nearby dish of some description.
It was only when the examination was over was Christine able to sit up, and of course had to look in the dish.

Sitting right in the middle was a Green Shield stamp....

Please, God... don't let me have to explain this one to Stuart....

 

[Doug B]

 

[Phill05]

Please, God... don't let me have to explain this one to Stuart....

Come on Stuart we are waiting

 

[Amateur]

Breaking news.

Harry has admitted never seeing his wife naked and now suspects hes been sleeping with a hired double.

Has the penny dropped?

 

[Ozi]

Obama vs. Trump ?

I'd pay good money to see that

 

[bushwhaker]

Breaking news.

Harry has admitted never seeing his wife naked and now suspects hes been sleeping with a hired double.

Has the penny dropped?

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ME
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[Blackswanwood]

 

[Sachakins]

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If you get it right your chancellor!

 

[Cordy]

 

[selectortone]

I'd like to congratulate Prince Harry, it takes some doing to make people feel sorry for the Taliban.

 

[Jameshow]

I'd like to congratulate Prince Harry, it takes some doing to make people feel sorry for the Taliban.

Talking about burning bridges.....