Joke Thread 4 (closed).

[Phil Pascoe]

We have Carn Brea - both words mean "hill".

 

[AES]

We have Carn Brea - both words mean "hill".

The worst jokes usually start off with "I promise this is true". BUT: I DO Promise this is true ........... 'onest Guv.

Some years ago I worked in an office area divided into separate 2 man "bunkers" - each with a proper door. Because the cubicles had no window in the door, (only onto the windows on the outside of the building), each door facing the general open plan central area had an engraved plastic nameplate with, of course, the names of each "cell" occupant.

Just opposite me the two blokes sharing a cubicle - and this is where I REALLY do promise this IS true - were XXX Longbottom and YYY Lillicrap.

During an idle, alone moment, a "nice"(?) idea struck me, and with my trusty Swiss penknife I unscrewed the two plastic nameplates, cut each in half vertically, then screwed them back on the door again.

Result?

The door plates now read "XXXX Longcrap" and "YYYY Lillibottom".

Well it amused me at least.

 

[Kittyhawk]

We have a place called Waikikamukau.

 

[Robbo3]

 

[johnb80]

 

[Doug B]

 

[kinverkid]

 

[kinverkid]

I did have an imaginary girlfriend when I was young. God, she was ugly.

 

[artie]

View attachment 186014

I have always said, the only one glad to see me coming was the dog.

He always walked me to the gate and welcomed me home.

 

[Phil Pascoe]

Man's best friend? Lock your dog and your wife in the boot of your car for an afternoon and see which one is happy to see you when you let them out.

 

[Phil Pascoe]

 

[Phil Pascoe]

 

[selectortone]

I may be way off base here but I'm starting to suspect Phil Pascoe isn't 100% in favour of Keir Starmer.

 

[Phil Pascoe]

I'm balanced. I wasn't in favour of Sunak either.

 

[Noel]

@Phil Pascoe This is a joke thread (mostly) . If you want to make political statements please go elsewhere.

 

[johnb80]

FWIW I thought they were more humorous than political.

Anyway, to stay on topic:-

 

[Phil Pascoe]

@Phil Pascoe This is a joke thread (mostly) . If you want to make political statements please go elsewhere.

Sorry. I didn't realise I wasn't allowed to joke about St. Starmer.

 

[Noel]

Sorry. I didn't realise I wasn't allowed to joke about St. Starmer.

I put two back which just might pass the joke threshold (although that's a low bar considering some of the contributions to the thread...).
The other two, not so much.

 

[Vulcan]

Can I put this here? Posted together these two unrelated facts amuse me! Yeah, I know, strange sense of humour.

 

[Vulcan]

He even got two thumbs up!