It's "Wally Of The Week" Time Again

[doorframe]

Yes... and this week it's ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All through the recent good weather I'd been promising SWMBO I would give the driveway a going over. You know, de-weed the block paving, change the hanging baskets and planters, and prune the evergreen shrubs on the raised plum-slate covered border.

So, Saturday and Sunday were reserved for the big event... AKA 'Keeping Up With The Jones''.

All went well (although I lost most of the skin off my knees weeding the block paving). But after the pruning there was a ton of cuttings littering the border looking a right mess., completely covering the plum slate. Swmbo looked on expectantly, expecting every single leaf to be cleared for maximum"Look-at-my-lovely-driveway" effect. This was a daunting task, and with the rain on the way I needed to think fast.

A-HA!!! Master stroke! Straight down to the workshop to collect my as yet unused Electra Beckam extractor. The neihbours looked on in awe as I proudly wheeled it out onto the drive. On went the filter bag, on went the waste bag, and on went the 4" hose. Was I looking professional or what?

Then, into action I went. What suction! Those leaves never stood a chance! Neither did the plumslate!!!!!!!!! Straight up it went and shatterred the impellor!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. The machine, now well out of balance, started to vibrate worse than my old Sierra. It shook itself across the paving and was falling over as I dived to salvage what remained of it (and my dignity). As I launched into a tirade of pineapples, the viewing public were unsure whether to come to my aid or fall on the floor laughing. As they turned away their bouncy shoulders and stifled sniggering gave away thier delight at my fall from grace. All I could do was sort out all the particles of impellor from the pile of foliage now tipped all over the not-so-nice-looking driveway.

The extractor is now back in the corner of the workshop, with a bag of bits stuck to it.

WHAT A PLONKER!

Roy

 

[9fingers]

It would be churlish not to agree wholeheartedly with your final statement!!


Bob

 

[barkwindjammer]

:shock:
ROFL

 

[chunkolini]

Quality work.
It is important to remind ourselves just how crap the male species is sometimes.
did you get it caught on film for Utube?
Chunko'.

 

[studders]

Yes.... you are a Plonker

But... you are not alone.

I, ahem, know someone who tried to clear his garden path of weeds as quickly as possible by using his propane torch. Was going great until I, I mean He, set fire to his Conifers. Man do those things burn quickly.

 

[Racers]

Hi,

I sucked the dust bag from my makita sander up my 4" hose the impeller cut it in a couple of places.
I had to sew it back together!

Pete

 

[spannermonkey]

Best way to clear leaves is put the mower on the highest cutting and hoover them up like that.

I did that and smashed two windows of my neighbours car with flying stones.

 

[kmcleod]

hmm,,,just because man is a tool user, don't always follow that he is an intelligent tool user...

Thanks for posting, it's reassuring that I'm not the only one out there who gets it wrong sometimes....

 

[wobblycogs]

Ah, nothing like a good laugh as someone elses misfortune to make you feel better (nasty case of man-flu over here). Good luck fixing your extractor.