Phill05
Established Member
She's dropped her price since the cartoon was last here.
Deflation !!
Another Joke
- Thread starter Alexam
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Deflation !!
Doug B
Shy Tot
Covid 19, Brexit or latest conspiracy theoryShe's dropped her price since the cartoon was last here.
Doug B
Shy Tot
Phil Pascoe
Established Member
loftyhermes
Established Member
My wife was reapplying for her driving licence and said she was donating all of her organs.i I said who's going to want your cold heart Thats when the fight started 
Sachakins
The most wasted of days is one without woodwork
Thats lucky, chance to fight, I don't think I would have seen the 2x4 coming before I hit the floor face first.....My wife was reapplying for her driving licence and said she was donating all of her organs.i I said who's going to want your cold heart Thats when the fight started
Bit of a high price for a driving license...My wife was reapplying for her driving licence and said she was donating all of her organs.i I said who's going to want your cold heart Thats when the fight started
Doug B
Shy Tot
Doug B
Shy Tot
Doug B
Shy Tot
Two men went out poaching rabbits, each armed with a shotgun. A hang glider flew overhead so the first man raised his shotgun and let fly.
2nd man: "hey, what was that?"
1st man: "I don't know, but I made it let go of that bloke".
2nd man: "hey, what was that?"
1st man: "I don't know, but I made it let go of that bloke".
Doug B
Shy Tot
A woman is in a jewellers admiring a large diamond ring, as she leans down for a closer look a little trump slips out, hoping no one noticed she asks “how much is that one”
The jeweller replies “madam if just looking at it caused you to fart I dread to think what you’ll do if I tell you the price”
The jeweller replies “madam if just looking at it caused you to fart I dread to think what you’ll do if I tell you the price”
A dyslexic man walks into a bra
Sachakins
The most wasted of days is one without woodwork
Was he KO?
Phil Pascoe
Established Member
Dyslexics lure, KO.
Driving our kids nuts!
Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me again, asking why I didn't do something useful with my time.
"Like sitting around the pool, drinking wine isn't a good thing?” I asked.
Talking about my "doing something useful" seems to be her favorite topic of conversation.
She is "only thinking of me," she said, and suggested I go down to the Senior Center and hang out with the fellas. I did and when I got home, I decided to play a prank on her. I sent her an e-mail saying that I had joined the Senior Parachute Club.
She replied, "Are you nuts? You're 72-years-old and now you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?"
I told her that I even had a Membership Card and e-mailed a copy to her.
Immediately, she telephoned me and yelled, "Good grief, Dad, where are your glasses?! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club."
"Oh man, am I in trouble," I said, "I signed up for five jumps a week!"
The line went dead.
Life as a Senior Citizen isn't getting any easier, but sometimes it can be fun.
Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me again, asking why I didn't do something useful with my time.
"Like sitting around the pool, drinking wine isn't a good thing?” I asked.
Talking about my "doing something useful" seems to be her favorite topic of conversation.
She is "only thinking of me," she said, and suggested I go down to the Senior Center and hang out with the fellas. I did and when I got home, I decided to play a prank on her. I sent her an e-mail saying that I had joined the Senior Parachute Club.
She replied, "Are you nuts? You're 72-years-old and now you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?"
I told her that I even had a Membership Card and e-mailed a copy to her.
Immediately, she telephoned me and yelled, "Good grief, Dad, where are your glasses?! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club."
"Oh man, am I in trouble," I said, "I signed up for five jumps a week!"
The line went dead.
Life as a Senior Citizen isn't getting any easier, but sometimes it can be fun.
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