Advice reqd. Executor of will and non co-operative relative

[Graham Orm]

I was contacted by a close friend 3 years ago to be told that I and another friend were his executors. Sadly he died last Saturday whilst living at the other end of the country. His estranged daughter turned up a couple of months ago after 20 years, and missing her mother's funeral. She has now steam rollered in and arranged the funeral excluding all old friends and family from this end of the country where he lived 90% of his life. Everyone is concerned that she has wangled the will somehow and I feel that it's my duty to at least check what's going on. He didn't tell me or the other executor the solicitors name where the will was lodged, I asked him specifically close to the end and he declined to tell me. My question.....is there a way I can find out? If the solicitor doesn't know he's dead he can't notify us or process the will.

I've spoken to the daughter briefly and she was very evasive and didn't answer my question re where the funeral was being held on 3 separate occasions during the conversation.

 

[Glynne]

I'm not sure there is anything you can do even if his funeral requests were contained in the will as this isn't something funeral directors look for.
If a family member commissions a funeral, the only real concerns they have is that there is a valid death certificate and that they are going to get paid.
The only time that you are likely to hear anything is when the estate is passed on as, if there is no will, the surviving relatives will have to go through probate and this can be complicated and they would be breaking the law by certifying no will exists. At this time the solicitors should be contacting you but don't be surprised if they offer to carry out your duties for you - usually for a fixed % of the value of the estate.
None of this helps your immediate problem but short of contacting local cemeteries & crematoria in the area you think he will be laid to rest, I think it will be a fait accompli.

 

[Graham Orm]

Thanks Glynne. My worry is that she hasn't informed the solicitor who holds the will.

 

[david123]

Hi grayorm
I agree with what Glynne had to say. The solicitor holding the will, will have the executors details and should contact you.
Funnily enough, I am the executor of my mums will and we are finally getting probation excepted after 8 months of paperwork. It has been a long haul. I wish you we'll.

Unfortunately your only job is to make sure that the contents of the will are strictly executed.

 

[Glynne]

I think the only thing you can do is contact the probate office, advise them that you believe you are an executor of your friends estate and wait to see if you are contacted in due course.
It may well be that your friend never got around to organising things formally and not knowing who the other executor is or the solictor's name does make things difficult.
As an added thought, you could try local newspapers (your neck of the woods and the daughters) for bereavement listings / funeral notifications but at best, this might just mean that you get to the funeral rather than influencing it.

I think by trying to find out what is going on you are honouring your friends wishes, so at least take some comfort from that.

 

[david123]

Hi mate
I was typing at the same time as you

 

[Glynne]

In which case can you please spell my name properly!

GLYNNE

 

[marcros]

Could you narrow down the area that the solicitor may have been located in when the will was written, and do an email to all of the local ones that cover wills and probate, just advising them that Mr x, and any details you have has passed away, and if they are in receipt of his will, then to contact the executor of said will? If it is sutton coldfield, there must be a limited number of companies, and you are not asking for any confidential information, just that they contact the executor contained within it.

 

[Mike.S]

First, my sympathies for the loss of your friend and for the situation you are now in.

Difficult to give an opinion without knowing more e.g. was your friend of sound mind; value of estate (negligible or home and other property to be disposed of?); had he given any indication of beneficiaries (those included and/or excluded); any knowledge of why daughter was estranged etc? Is it possible that he changed or destroyed his will but was reluctant to tell you to avoid embarrassment? I say this based on knowledge of a family member who regularly tells another family member that he's going to inherit X, when I know (as Executor) that it's untrue!

You could make enquiries of other friends, neighbours, doctor, local solicitors etc in case they can shed some light. Ultimately, if you conclude that the daughter has secreted/destroyed a will then it may be appropriate to write to the Probate Registry (which would issue Letters of Administration) expressing your concerns. However, many small estates can be wound up without LoA (e.g. Halifax will transfer £25k to next of kin without such).

A very difficult situation - I wish you well.

 

[Graham Orm]

Thanks for the input guys. I have spent the last hour ringing solicitors in the area of his home. No luck so far. Several are ringing me back. I have already tried the law society who weren't very helpful other than giving me the number of a company who are able to do a search for £140.
I'll keep going up this route I think until it's exhausted while I'm laid up with my back. There are plenty of solicitors to go at but I know he didn't travel far so I must strike lucky sooner or later.

Glynn and David 123. The worry is that his daughter has not informed the solicitor in an effort to claim the estate some how. I don't know the woman but the family all tell me bad things about her. The estate is significant by the way.
I am in contact with the other executor and he is as much ion the dark as me.

 

[Graham Orm]

Good news. I have found the solicitors. Thanks for the help guys.

Mike S Who the **** is that in your Avi???

 

[Mike.S]

Mike S Who the **** is that in your Avi???

No idea - received a copy of the image in an email and it made me smile :lol:

 

[Graham Orm]

Mike S Who the **** is that in your Avi???

No idea - received a copy of the image in an email and it made me smile :lol:

Scary !

 

[joethedrummer]

Mike S Who the **** is that in your Avi???

No idea - received a copy of the image in an email and it made me smile :lol:

Scary !

He sure reminds us of a saxophone player we hired way back and also of some sort of cr
iminal,,,,but then he could well be both ,,,


Sorry for that,,,got well off topic !!!!!!

 

[Hivenhoe]

Nothing like weddings and deaths to bring out the best in people.
That didn't take you too long to find.

 

[Graham Orm]

Nothing like weddings and deaths to bring out the best in people.
That didn't take you too long to find.

I looked on Yell.com for all the solicitors in the area. It was the very first one I dialed, but the solicitor was out and the receptionist asked me to call back in an hour, so in the hour I rang a couple of dozen more DOH! At least I found them. She said she would ring me back today or tomorrow.

 

[dickm]

From bitter experience, be VERY careful on this one. Wife and I got roped in during the final illness of a close friend and distant relation of Mother-in-Law. She'd made a will, so it was easy to find, but it was challenged by other closer family members. We thought we were trying to uphold the deceased's wishes contrary to this branch of the family, but it didn't work out like that. Upshot was a very unpleasant period including a court appearance 200 miles from home with incompetent barrister, at least one incompetent, and one probably bent, solicitor. There seemed to be a built in assumption that closer relatives had the moral high ground. I hope you can see the implications of this.
If you do get involved, make sure you have a really reliable solicitor to help you; if you don't already have one, ask around for good reports before choosing. Whatever you do, don't go in unsupported.

 

[Graham Orm]

Thanks for the advice Dickm I don't plan to get roped in, just trying to do what was asked of me. If it comes to a fight I'll back away and let the family deal with it if they want to. I have too much of my own going on to get dragged into that sort of thing. Thanks again.

 

[Woodchips2]

Best of luck with this Grayorm, I settled a very simple will when a close relative died earlier this year with no property involved yet I still have about 6" depth of papers! It took about three months to finalise and you have to chase and chase people for answers.

I would have expected if I was named as an executor to have been given a copy of the will when it was signed.

Regards Keith

 

[Lons]

Mike S Who the **** is that in your Avi???

No idea - received a copy of the image in an email and it made me smile :lol:

Barry Manilow on a good day