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DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST! It takes less than a minute. Work this out as you read ... Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out! This is not one of those waste of time things, it's fun...

MALE WORLD Movie nudity is virtually always female. You know stuff about tanks. You can open all your own jars. When clicking through channels, you don't have to stall on every shot of someone crying. Your rear-end is never a factor in a job interview. Guys in hockey masks don't attack you. You...

When Joe, a nice man married for over 50 years died, his wife, Myrtle was devastated. A couple of months later, Myrtle also died. Once in heaven, Myrtle anxiously looked for Joe. Suddenly, behind a cloud, she could clearly see him. She ran towards him, calling his name: "Joe. Darling.. " Joe...

"Hello?" "Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mommy near the phone?" "No Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul." After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Paul." "Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy, right now." Brief Pause. "Uh...

FEMALE GEOGRAPHY - Between 18 and 20, a woman is like Africa : wild, naturally beautiful and full of mysterious, fertile deltas. - Between 21 and 30, a woman is like America : well-developed and open for trade, especially for those with stacks of money. - Between 31 and 35, a woman is...

I also tend to have those "intellectual Intermissions"! :D

Andrew & Joe, posted some pics on Gallery. 8) 8)

TWO STATUES > > There are two statues in a park; one of a nude man and one of a nude > woman. > > They had been facing each other across a pathway for a hundred years, > when one day an angel comes down from the sky and, with a single > gesture, brings the two to life. > > The angel tells...

26 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP 1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having *** in a twin bed is out of the question. 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. 4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed. 5. You hear your...

Ole Blue A young farm lad from North Iowa goes off to college, but about 1/3 of the way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered away all of the money his parents gave him. Then he gets an idea. He calls his daddy. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe the wonders that modern...

GREAT looking green rugga jersey that he's wearing!!!!!!!! 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) Not quite sure what the piece of equipment is in his hand? There is no power cable? :shock:

Andrew, i will post in the gallery over the long-weekend. 8)

Well, yesterday at the Church Fete, is the first time I have ever sold any of my “artwork”. All proceeds to the Church. Scroll-saw work:- The doorstops went like a flash, especially the Yellow Wood ones. The animals also did well and also the puzzles for small kids. My favourite the Meercat in...

Son goes to father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?" The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a...

Cold Calling The scene …. Weekday evening at about 08:30, dinner & dishes done, settle down into comfortable chair ……….. Ring, Ring, Ring goes the phone. Now who would be calling this time of night? “Hello, XYZ speaking” “Good evening, Mr. XYZ, and how are YOU tonight?” Well up goes the...

HTML? Well 40 years ago we wrote programs in machine code, Neat&Best. Calculator? Looked at that slide rule the other day, hmmmmmmmm, would need a course on how to use it. Who can remember the old Holirith Plug board machine? Punch cards? Anyway, back to HTML. Actually quite easy to use and...

SOME MORE IRISH JOKES Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, "Do you want to go to heaven?" The man said, "I do, Father." The priest said, "Then stand over there against the wall." Then the priest asked the second man, "Do you want to go to heaven?"...

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.... what more can I say........

A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back." "Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife. "I'm going to the...

A cowboy story Sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, A young cowboy recognized an elderly man standing at the bar who in his day had the reputation of being the fastest gun in the West. The young cowboy took a place next to the old-timer, bought him a drink and told him the story of his great...