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A funny for woodworkers; Jesus was walking around Heaven one day. In a small, secluded garden He saw an old man, crying. Alarmed, Jesus ran up to him and said, “Hey, now, what’s all this? This is paradise. There should be no tears or sorrow.” The old man wiped away his tears and said, “Oh, I...

I see Biden has sent a sympathy message to The Donald " Sorry to hear about the attempt on your life President Reagan "

My wife and I have started roll play in the bedroom. Her favourite is sexy librarian. Where I have to sit quietly whilst she reads her book.

As a child we were so poor that all of my school clothes came from the Army Surplus shop. I was the only Japanese General in my class.

I made a Fibonacci Gauge years ago -- never found a use for it. If I can find it tomorrow I will take a photo.

@ Damien Wright Hi, Wigan Timber have now ceased trading, not sure where I will go now. For Oak and Walnut I make the trip to British Hardwoods at Keighley, decent timber but I've not been there for a couple of years

One for the Botanists... Q; Who led the Israelites through the Semi Permeable Membrane ? A; Osmosis.

A couple, Dave and Mabel, were staying at the Grand Hotel Llandudno -- fourth floor. Dave calls the Hotel Manager "Come up quick. we've been arguing and Mabel wants to throw herself out of the window !!" The manager replied "Sir, this is a personal matter, I can call sec....." Dave interrupts...

@ rs6mra; Hi Just measured the thickness of chair arms and back slats both about 22mm Instead of drilling and plugging the holes I used pocket hole joinery and drilled from the underside. More work but neater and better weather proofing. Mr King's chair does nothing for me, far too many chances...

This Whitehead Junior Planer still gets used, dates around 1955

17th of March is also the traditional day for planting seed potatoes Some from last year - Sarpo Mira, main crop

I was abducted by Aliens. I was made to - wash my hands, clean my room and eat all my vegatables. Turns out I was on the Mothership.

No man is an Island, although my son Archie comes close Jack Pelago

I don't want to die like Julius Caesar, surrounded by friends.....

An old fella was celebrating 92 years on this earth. He spoke to his toes: "Hello, toes." He said. "How are you? You know, you are 92 today. Oh, the times we've had! Remember how we walked in the park in the summer every Sunday afternoon? The times we waltzed on the dance floor? Happy...

Entered my painting of Orion's Belt into an art competition.. I didn't win, but I did get a constellation prize.

Reading flyers more carefully, substantially lowers the risk of being the only one at Slimming World wearing speedos and goggles.

Cheers @ Wildman