# A kind of all-time hiii...



## Ikisumu (27 May 2010)

I spotted this on a shelf of a discount store. I decided to buy it on the spot. And now I want to share it with all of you. 

It is called a "Jack plane". I assure you, everything is absolutely out-of-the-box. 

I have never ever before seen anything even remotely like this. 

I can't do anything for it at all. There is no single working detail in it. Nothing. Even the screw thread tolerances are so loose (or filled with that black goo) that there is actually no screw thread tolerances at all. 




























































































And so on.

I want to hug my wooden planes tightly and tell them that everything is allright.

Samu


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## matthewwh (27 May 2010)

The expression 'you can't polish a cowpat' springs to mind..


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## Oryxdesign (27 May 2010)

It says on the box "Quality the World Prefers". I think they are probably too many people seem to be happy with poor quality.


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## Racers (27 May 2010)

Hi,

My god thats bad, very bad, very very bad.


Pete


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## SammyP64 (27 May 2010)

if thats what is being reffered to nowa days as "quality" ide hate to see what THEY classify s a s**t piece...

thats astounding how they can market that at 15 euros too...

I would have taken it back and said "im sorry, but this is false advertising, it clearly says quility, of which the boxes contents are so far from i couldn't posibly even begin to explain to you"



Sammy


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## Blister (27 May 2010)

Take it back for a refund :?


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## Philly (27 May 2010)

Awesome! :lol: 
Love the chipbreaker - or is that "chip-scraper"?
Philly :lol:


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## Ikisumu (27 May 2010)

Beats me, Philly.

It would also make an outrageous prize for some dingbat competition at work. The first prize will be one of those. The second prize will be two of those.

Guys, I really want to speak for good tools on my behalf, no matter who makes them and where. I want to somehow contribute so that for example if some kid who wants to try working with wood, he wouldn't ever get anything like that from his parents, or any other people. I know it can be a tall order, but still.

Samu

Edit, english is difficult...


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## laird (27 May 2010)

Mount it on a plinth and give it to some club for a "biggest c*^k-up of the year" award.


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## billw (27 May 2010)

The barcode suggests that was made in Finland :?


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## woodbloke (27 May 2010)

I think something could be done with it 8-[ ...not sure what though? - Rob


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## como (27 May 2010)

I can't see what the problem is :? , at least it's not made out of wood 8) 

oops, I'll get my coat


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## paininthe (27 May 2010)

Is that one of those friday afternoon planes?


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## AndyT (27 May 2010)

I can only see the "before" pictures - haven't you restored it yet?

:lol: :lol: :lol:


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## Tom K (27 May 2010)

Ikisumu":2p9rcxg8 said:


> I spotted this on a shelf of a discount store. I decided to buy it on the spot. And now I want to share it with all of you.
> 
> It is called a "Jack plane". I assure you, everything is absolutely out-of-the-box.
> Samu



Well researched obviously named from the English expression i.e
"That plane of yours is worth jack dung"


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## Mike H (27 May 2010)

Crracking door stopper, I think! Back door only, mind.

Mike

8)


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## Ikisumu (27 May 2010)

Wasn't that duty already reserved for Stanley #55? 



billw":1qvnqrg5 said:


> The barcode suggests that was made in Finland :?



Hell No! :shock: 

Samu


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## Henning (27 May 2010)

woodbloke":2kvvll4f said:


> I think something could be done with it 8-[ ...not sure what though? - Rob



Oh, i'm sure it'd make a good sink for a fishing line. Besides that i don't think it's much to be done with it. 

Makes me want to go hug my new (terrible, but a gem when i look at this) Stanley...


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## Klaus Kretschmar (27 May 2010)

Ikisumu":1wzul3r9 said:


> I spotted this on a shelf of a discount store. I decided to buy it on the spot. And now I want to share it with all of you.



Well, that´s a nice piece of junk! Every minute you spend on this "tool" is lost, even the time to disassemble it ... No chance to get it in usable condition.

Thanks for sharing it! A good warning for others!

Klaus


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## Ikisumu (27 May 2010)

My "pleasure". Sorry.  

Samu


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## MickCheese (27 May 2010)

SammyP64":2tch3koz said:


> That's astounding, how they can market that at 15 euros too...
> 
> Sammy



Phew, I miss read it, it's ok now, I thought it was pounds. :wink: 

Mick


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## jimi43 (27 May 2010)

What gets me is that there are people out there bad enough to make that...AND get away with marketing it!

I wonder who would buy one of those....?

Wait......

  :wink: 

Jim


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## Ikisumu (27 May 2010)

Yeah, who indeed... Eh.


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## SVB (27 May 2010)

Dear Mods,

Please can Ikisumu be excluded from this year's Secret Santa (or fix it so he gets the chief troll-meister :twisted: :twisted: )

Simon

:lol:


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## Trizza (27 May 2010)

Impressive! Last year for a laugh I bought a cheap plane from Clas Ohlson when they had some insane sales on - it was a number 5, and the box looked very similar to the one you show there. I'd almost guess they're from the same factory, except that it wasn't quite as bad looking as that one you got! I reckon it cost me 12€.

I put it back in its box until one rainy day I grabbed a six-pack and spent all afternoon fettling - and it now does a surprisingly good job, considering. Miserable backlash, and I'd have to spend another hour or two filing to get the sides square, but I actually got a very nice full width shaving from it just last week on beech countertop endgrain.


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## Ikisumu (28 May 2010)

Hi Trizza,

I once checked out those Clas Ohlson planes, and they resembled strongly those Anant planes. If I remember correctly, Ohlson used to also sell them under an obscure name of "Antika", too. Sure, with those ones a sixpack of plane fettling oil sounds like a good idea. 

You can get actually lucky with those Anants, however in the case of being not that lucky (like I was), you have in your hands a cast iron plane which seems to be almost as lively as wood. I once did this and that for one #4 Anant, and one of my final conclusions was for example that as I remove metal from one spot, I should add it to another. I went a bit too complicated in the end, and I decided to quit with it.

Samu


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## Benchwayze (28 May 2010)

woodbloke":1idceo9e said:


> I think something could be done with it 8-[ ...not sure what though? - Rob



Doorstop? Or is it not heavy enough!

John :lol:


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## Ikisumu (28 May 2010)

Benchwayze":2wkxm2ci said:


> woodbloke":2wkxm2ci said:
> 
> 
> > I think something could be done with it 8-[ ...not sure what though? - Rob
> ...



Given the fact it's mostly made of cast iron "foam", I'm afraid not. Wind may blow it away.  

There are terrible pores all over it. Just like in castings where sand has not been properly selected, dried and binded for the task. They just did not pay attention in these things either.

Samu


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## AndyT (28 May 2010)

We're all agreed it's a lousy tool. But stop and think for a moment - what sort of factory would produce something like this? One possibility is that it could be in India, with children working in scandalous conditions, for poverty wages. 

This sort of thing:







or this:






The product in the shop might be cheap but the cost is enormous.


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## wizer (28 May 2010)

Interesting. So if we buy the cheap rubbish made by these foreign sweat houses, we're encouraging poor work standards. Yet if we don't buy them, those people starve and die. 

I don't have the answer to that conundrum.


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## AndyT (28 May 2010)

Nor do I. 

And it doesn't help realising that the industrial conditions in India or China are repeating all the problems that Britain had in the C18th. Sorry for making this go all serious.


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## newt (28 May 2010)

Grim would sort that out.


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## Tim Nott (30 May 2010)

That is spectacularly, wonderfully, bad. In pretty well all respects. It's much, much worse than the Anant jointer I bought from Dick. I had a problem with the shavings blocking in the muth - a little filing sorted that - and the bolt that holds the chipbreaker to the iron is out of whack, so the former slides down the latter when I tighten the bolt. So one day I'll treat myselff to a new iron and chipbreaker.
Apart from that it's a beaut - very flat and with a lot of oomphy mass


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## clogger (1 Jun 2010)

Would not the knob and handle be useful??, surely you can salvage something?


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## bugbear (1 Jun 2010)

newt":90n8fwx4 said:


> Grim would sort that out.



He's too busy "ministering to the swinish luxury of the rich" with 1500 quid kitchen tables for people pretending to be poor!

BugBear


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